I felt aweful. I mean I couldn't even think of what Flavia would do if she knew. If her feelings for me were as strong as mine for her then she would kill Rose without a second thought. While I hated humans there was a knowing within in me telling me I couldn't deal with that if it happened.
Why wasn't I able to tell Flavia? Like I said the mere thought brought about the feeling of dread. "How about this?" Flavia's happy, soft, musical voice dragged me from my thoughts and I turned to look at her.
She was wearing a daring red dress and it looked amazing on her. "Its wonderful" I whisper but I could tell she heard the lack of emotion in my words. From her thoughts and the look she shot at me as she walked back into the changing rooms I could tell she had wanted me to be shocked and in awe of her. I almost wanted to hit myself. I was being so stupid, if she got surpicious then she would no doubtedly search and dig for the truth. All of this was the reason my mind was a jumble of thoughts and no matter how hard she tried... Flavia couldn't hear one.
"What's the matter with you today?" I suddenly realised that Flavia had come out of the changing rooms once again, had taken my arm and now we were walking out of the shops having paid for quite a lot of clothing.
"Oh, sorry, just.... I have a lot on my mind" I say with a smile, which I made sure to have the exact amount of charm, arrogance and innocence that I usually displayed. It was too bad I didn't get away with it at all.
"Why have you got a lot on your mind?" The question was simple but for a moment it stirred fear in me and I was left without the ability to speak. Then I realised all I had to do was come up with a simple explanation and I found one.
"It was just I have to go meet someone tonight that I really don't want to" I look directly in her eyes as I say it showing that pain she would cause if she persisted this subject and with a sigh I knew she had given up.
"Don't be moody for the rest of our day together" She gripped my hand tighter as she spoke and I tightened my grip back.
"I won't" I told her perfectly honest.
I sat on the wall. I watched as she laughed with a boy which through her thoughts I knew was her boyfriend and who I slowly discovered was a werewolf. I found an unwanted growl come to my lips at the knowledge and cut it off almost instantly. She leant up and kissed him and I had to look a way. This was too painful to watch and I didn't even know why I was here to begin with but strangely earlier the thought came the moment I knew I could.
It was like a forbidden need inside me had risen up and told me that she was what I need. She was who I needed to see for the night. So I had complied without a second thought thinking that I would be able to prove to myself that I did not have something within me that wanted her. That there was no forbidden pulse in my chest that told me to go to her but there was.
As I watched her I found myself noticing things, the way her black hair glinted in the human made light, the way she swept it back as she scrubbed the dishes with delicate hands. I even found the light in her eyes beautiful but also dreadful from the fact they were shining for him.... my competitor... but not for long.
"No!" I growled to myself making my teeth retract. I couldn't take on a werewolf just for some girl. I didn't even want this girl. The thoughts felt false though, echoing through my head hollow and not seeming to register. I realised I would have to wait. I needed to see this girl alone. One part of me saying to prove all of these abnormal things happening were false and another saying cause I needed to.
I didn't have to wait long. The moment the dog retreated to his room to rest I was in ther kitchen. I stood behind her watching her fingers delicately lift the plates into the cupboards and place the cutlery in its tray. "Hello, Rose" I whisper. She jumped at my voice and span round in a moment.
"You" She whispered. I felt almost disapointed by that but then I remembered that she knew nothing of me and that this was strange for her to even think she did.
"You?" I question.
"But your... your just a dream" she gasped putting a hand to her neck. I began to panic. She knew me! She dreamt of me! The second one actually made me a tiny bit happy but I stamped on it before it could grow.
"What do you mean a dream?" I ask. My voice had now gone cold, my eyes had narrowed and I was zooming in on her. My steps were delicate and silent. She didn't move. It was almost as if she had waited for me to stand in front of her. Then she did something I didn't expect she reached out and touched my face. I froze, trying to look at her fingers as they traced my face. When they moved onto my lips I shivered.
"You're... you're real" She whispered.
"That I am" I reply my voice hoarse and trembling. I couldn't help myself I leant in and kissed her. I couldn't explain why I had no want to kiss her it was just the simple need to. To know what it felt like, to be close to her and to understand this foreign pulse within my veins.
I almost thought she would push me back but she didn't if anything she pulled me closer, her fingers threading into my hair. It was almost perfect then Flavia flashed into my mind. I pushed Rose away and span round. There she was.... standing in the door way eyes blazing.
Then she was racing, across the room and at Rose.... but I stepped in the way. I grabbed Flavia and we were back across the room with me pinning her to the wall. She was growling screaming and scratching at my flesh. "Stop it, Flavia" I hiss.
"Her! Why are you kissing her?!? You're with me!" I looked at her face and she was furious. Her fangs were out and her eyes were black abyss. Then the footsteps came down the stairs and he was there.... the dog. He looked at us and growled... literally.
"Marcus, what-" She stopped talking when I looked at her, her cheeks blushing and putting her lips then her neck. "I'm sorry" She whispered.
"What do you mean your-" The dog, who I now knew was called Marcus followed her eyes to me. "No..." His voice was full of pain and slowly he backed away not from me but from her. Flavia took that distraction to bring her knee up into my gut and toss me across the room.
"Your a cheating coward!" She screamed. Then she was gone out of the door and the house. Marcus just stood in the door way. His head was hanging and his whole body was almost an empty shell. I looked at him then Rose who was looking between us in pain.
"I'll save you the choice and leave" I say simply walking to the backdoor but before I get there a fist hits my cheek and I'm knocked aside into the door. I look up to see Marcus.
"Now you can get out" He growled. I was gone without a trace but a swinging backdoor.