Allie Laniger: The Things I've LostMature

Glaring at the fire I attempted to somehow control it. It did begin to do as I wanted, curling up slightly towards me as though in some sort of pain and then scaring the living daylights out of me by flinging itself off of the tree directly past my face; brushing my skin as it went.

It was at this point that I realised my hands were shaking rather violently and adrenalin was coursing through my veins to emphasise the panic I was feeling. The panic I hadn't even realised I had been feeling.

Marcus. Out of nowhere, his name popped into my head. Here I was in this potential paradise, messing around with my powers and he could be anywhere... how had I not thought of him before then? I'm such a terrible person. I pushed this to the back of my mind - I could search for him later, he could easily take care of himself... I wished he were there though; to take care of me.

I looked around myself and nervously began to take tiny steps towards the trees. As trusting of people I was, trees were another story. But then, I did quite like this whole thing; being alone and deserted. In all honesty it was quite calming after all the madness which the university and the other zodiacs had put into my life.

I never wanted to be part of this. I was happy just being a normal girl... or as normal as a zodiac could be... but I didn't even know I had powers! I sighed at my anger. It was no use really, I had no way of changing the path I had been set on.. I just happened to be the unfortunate Aries who took on her zodiac to it's full potential and became some power-crazy and yet still apparently uncontrollable witch. Not that I am a witch... it just feels like that sometimes.

Thinking back to my life before the gate turned everything upside down, I really had a bright future. I was as happy alone as I was with most other people; I loved running like a close friend and Marcus... Marcus was the most important part of my life. And now it is as though he is just another blacksmith. Nothing special.

Over the past year I had often wondered what it would be like if I had never been 'called'; if I had never been forced into becoming one of the 'guardians' and as I wandered aimlessly across the sandy paradise I let the familiar images fill my mind.
I would pass the sports course I was currently on; I would graduate university; I would probably not use the qualification for anything at all except the knowledge that I was trained and the motivation to keep fit; I would go back for a qualification in something working with people - psychology - or perhaps something where I wouldn't need to talk to other people - such as working towards becoming a surgeon - and in the end of it all I would get the job I worked so hard for. And Marcus would be by my side for the entire thing and if we were to marry and I were to come to being pregnant then I would put my life on hold, doing night-classes once the baby was born perhaps.
All these images flashed through my head, the proof of my qualifications, the cap and gown, the smile on my parents' faces, the smile on Marcus' face, the wedding and all the beautiful things which would be within it, the pregnancy, the beautiful baby-

Not realising how carried away I had let myself get, I had managed to unknowingly break into a pace somewhere between jogging and running - thank God for my power, otherwise I could have ended up seriously hurt by running into a few dozen trees - and had taken myself through the forest area into the water on the other side.
Either my mind was playing tricks on me or this was definitely an island.

Sadly the images I had been thinking through bled from my mind into my surroundings and were lost for the time being as the realisation washed over me that once I was discovered to be chosen as a zodiac, all of those dreams were shattered.

No matter how good my imagination was, I couldn't force things to come true. 

The End

2 comments about this exercise Feed