I open my eyes and there is a strange, dark grey mist seeping under the door. Ryan, balanced on top of me, has noticed as well. Suddenly he jumps up.
"FUCK! TALLY! Thats SMOKE!" He yells, grabbing his shirt from the floor he wriggles into it. I open the door, still not quite believing there is a fire in my own house, my sanctuary, my safe place. Then I see the orange flames licking at the bottom of the stairs.
"MUM! DAD! OWEN!" I yell. There is no sound. They were all downstairs.. I try not to think of what might have happened to them. "We have to get out." I say to Ryan, trying to keep my voice from wavering.
"No shit sherlock!" He bursts out. His perfect face is flushed from the great amounts of heat the fire is emitting, and sweat is pouring down his cheeks. I can feel my own clothes sticking to my sweaty body. My brother, Owen, 's favourite hoodie is hanging on the banister. I snatch it up, knowing he will be incredibly pissed if he loses it.
"Come on!" I yell to Ryan, who is staring at the flames, transfixed by his horror. He shook himself, and then scooped me into his arms. He kissed me, and looking into my eyes, murmured: "If I don't make it, know that I love you. I always will."
"If I don't make it-" I begin, but he presses a finger to my lips, cutting me off.
"You're going to make it. And if you don't, I won't make it either, because I am going to do everything in my power to help you survive. I love you Tally. I really do."
"I love you too.." I whisper. Then he runs down the hall way and into my parent's bedroom. Setting me down, he lifts the mattress and tells me to open the window. I do, opening it as wide as it will go. He begins to push the mattress out of the window, but it is too big, it won't go through. I gulp and run back into the hall. The flames have reached the top of the stairs.
"Shove!" He yells. I shove the mattress, putting all my weight onto it. It slides forward a tiny bit, and I shove again. Little by little, it moves forward. I try not to think of the flames creeping down the hall, thinking instead of how happy we will both be when we survive. If we survive.. The a little voice mutters. I gulp again, my breathing heavy and feverish. I shove again and the mattress slides forward, so only a tiny bit of it is left inside, the rest is hanging from the window. I look round, and time slows down. I see the flames licking at the doorway. Ryan has seen them too. His adrenaline kicks in and he gives an almighty shove, and the mattress falls to the ground. He scoops me up again, kissing me, before throwing me onto the mattress. He is just about to jump when the flames reach him. They slide up his legs, over his waist, up his torso and engulf his face. His last words are: "I LOVE YOU TALLY! FOREVER!" And then he collapses, out of my sight. I shut my eyes and suddenly-
I jolt awake. Breathing a sigh of relief, I realise it was all just a dream. Then I look around at my surroundings. This isn't my room.. I think looking around slowly. Then it all hits me. That wasn't just a dream. It really happened. My whole family are dead, and so is Ryan. The authorities sent me to a home for troubled teens when I sobbed uncontrollably all through the counselling session they tried to give me.
With a small cry, I see my pencil sharpener lying on the floor, having fallen out of my bag. It is brand new, a bag of essentials the home has given me. I unscrew the little bolt holding the blade in place with a calligraphy pen nib. Then I take hold of the blade and score it across my arm. A line of red forms. I cut myself again, and again until I can no longer stand the pain. Then I hide the bloodstained blade under the mattress on my bed, pull on one of my new, long sleeved t-shirts along with the pair of Ryan's jeans and belt I was wearing on the day of the fire and my brother's hoodie. Then I lie on the bed and will myself into sleep.