Silas: Making AmendsMature

I hadn't got much sleep but I had decided to pretend to at the very least. Flossie was sleeping next to me  - she had been so kind to me after all that I had done. I didn't really deserve a friend like her. Harry and Aimee were snuggling up with each other since Aimee had started cuddling up to him after talking with Louise. I had watched her parking the van and could hear her crying to herself.

I wanted to go over to her and to hug the tears away but I knew that it would just make things worse. We weren't getting on right now. I tried to cry myself to sleep but it wasn't working - I was just so upset that I had lost her. She meant so much to me. My Louise.

It must have been around 5am when I left the van and sat in the open air, letting the wind blow through my hair. I was still crying but that had stopped bothering me hours ago.

"What are you doing out here?" Louise asked me, her voice betraying her suspicion and how tired she was.

"Just getting some fresh air." I mumbled. "Don't worry - I'm not going to run away again."

"I wouldn't care if you did." She was about to go back into the van when I stopped her.

"Can we talk? Out here." I took her hand but she pulled away from my touch. She looked at me and I could see the feelings, the love, but it was retreating deep into her. "Please."

I was tempted to get down on my knees and beg for her to sit with me but I didn't need to - she was walking towards me anyway.

"What do you want Silas?" Her voice wasn't going to betray her feelings so I didn't know how annoyed she was.

"I want to apologise. I didn't mean to kill that man, you know that." I mumbled to my feet, hoping that she would understand.

"You took my weapon. You shot someone. Am I supposed to just forgive you like that?" I could see that she was near to crying and that if she did that, she'd probably leave me.

"I was only trying to protect you. I didn't want you to have to do what I did." I could hear the sadness creeping into my voice.

"But I wouldn't have done it. That's the difference between us." She got up.

"Please Louise. I only did it for you."

She was walking away now. "That's so romantic, Silas."

"But I love you, Louise." I stood up and was looking at her, waiting for her to turn around, look into my eyes and tell me the same. My heart was waiting for the fairytale ending. But it never came.

"Leave me alone." She muttered as she clambered back into the van, leaving me alone as it started to rain.

I was pathetic. I had lost her. I let the water wash over me, mingling in with my tears. I looked into the van and caught her looking at me for just a split second.

Maybe not.

The End

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