Me: Hello?

Caller (Eastern European accent): Sausages, get your sausages here!

Me: Excuse me?


Caller: I say ‘sausages, get your sausages here!'

Me: And who are you?

Caller: I sell sausages. Lovely sausages. Sausages-

Me: 'Get my sausages there.' So I heard the first time. I know. Look, what are you doing selling sausages on the telephone?

Caller: I am a mobile seller.

Me: What? Is that a new breed of door-to-door salesman?

Caller: door?


Me (rolling eyes): Well, if I wanted some, where would I get said sausages?

Caller: You want sausages? That I can do. I sell sausages. Get your sausages here!

Me (frustrated): Yes, but where is here?

Caller: My shop here of course. My shop sell sausages-

Me: Where?!

Caller: I was about to say. No interrupt me, okay? My shop sell sausages! Opposite main street market. You go there, you buy many sausages.

Me (slowly): And, why would I buy your sausages?

Caller: Scrumptious! Pure German meat. Get your sausages here!

Me: Okay! Okay!

Caller: So…you buy sausages?

Me: No, sorry. I’m a vegetarian.


The End

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