Ramblings of a mad girl. The self-centered chattering that others may understand and others may not. The thoughts that go through the head of an adolescent human female confuse even the female herself and sometimes, just sometimes, "talk to someone" just isn't enough.
The only unforgivable thing. Not the average music of a teenaged female, but mine for the listening. Gravity would only pull us down.
A diary? I'm giving up on that as it never helped me, not at all. I just couldn't shout loud enough when I had a pen in my hand; a pen that I use daily to move my imaginary life forward. The life of easy GCSEs is one everyone must partake, one that everyone has partaken. Having looked back at the tears and the hair-pulling and the torment of something that becomes yet another of life's examined hurdles.
After a long pause where I stop to reflect on Marbles IV, I realize what my life is becoming. My marbles are being taken away and I'm not holding on to my favourites closely enough. This makes me sad, knowing that I will turn out just like all the adults.
Marillion is my favourite prog band at the moment. Although the lyrics barely relate to my feelings (bloody teens), they make me feel like I have someone to sing with. I don't sing with people very often any more. Ben was my singing partner back in the day; good times.
I can't stop doing this to him. Over and over again, I'm trying to tell him something through the use of metaphors, irony and sarcasm; methods I swore I wouldn't use. I told myself I would be straight with him. I told myself I wouldn't be like all those other girls.
But here I am. The thing I hate the most. Teenaged human female. An angry troll under a virtual bridge, snarling up at him as he tentatively tries to walk across. Sometimes, we swap stories to compare my imaginary problems to his past life. It's nice. Makes me feel less selfish.