Near And Far

Why hasn't she seen it yet? It's right in front of her! She must be an idiot, for all those brains. I'm sending her the message in everything I say, everything I do, everything I've written. I try and draw her attention to it, but her gaze slides right over, like it just never occurred to her that I could feel that way.

Okay. We'll try it another way. Why don't I just tell her? Show her?

And she's still not even looking. Like all of that never happened. It's like she's pretending we're who we were a week ago. Is it that painful to remember? Have I screwed her up that much? Or is she just trying to be tactful, to skim over in case she upsets me or makes me feel like I have to answer awkward questions?

Damn. I wish she'd be a little less considerate. I want her to talk to me about it, to confront me. Then I'll have a chance to tell her. But do I? Because then people might find out. I'm not sure I want her to. I want her to know, but I don't know if I do. I don't know. It's so obvious. Why hasn't she seen?

Do I want her to see?

I guess maybe she doesn't want to. Maybe that's why she's pretending it never happened. But man, I can't pretend any more, I just can't. I know it shouldn't be like this, because this is so screwed up and wrong, but I just can't help it.

None of us ever can, can we?

Please... why can't she see?

The End

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