Drunken Phonecall

*Ring, ring*

Heeey, baby... uh, baby girl... how're you doin'? ... Sleeping huh? Is it really that late already? Damn, I guess it is, I'm sorry but you're just so wonderful and I miss you and--... drunk? Me? Well I did have a few shots... What noise? There's no one with me... no... Okay, I am driving. I don't wanna' crash at someone's house, I wanna sleep in my own damn bed!

Why are you so mad? I mean, I'm just trying to call you to talk to you and see what's going on with you... I know I don't call as much as I should and when I do, I don't say much... huh? Hang on a second? No, I don't want to hang on a sec--... Oh, getting dressed eh? What were you wearing before? ... Shutup Tony! She's my girl and you better not get no ideas about-- huh? Nevermind it, baby, just some idiot in my car.

Are you dressed now? Okay, that's good, 'cause now we can communicate together about... uhh... well I'm not sure what... What? Don't worry about that, I'm driving perfectly fine. I just love you so much, you know? You're so wonderful, and sexy, and like... I just wanna' marry you, right now. How about it, will you marry me baby? Baby? Answer me! Why don't you wanna' marry me? I thought you loved me... huh? You will? Great! You don't sound very excited... Oh well, tomorrow then! We'll go and get... for the last time, woman, I'm not drunk!

You know what? You're just being a total b*tch right now, baby. You really are, I mean I'm trying to be nice and talk to you and you're just flapping your mouth and nagging me for drinking! You telling me to shutup? No, you shutup! Wow, you're just awful, you know that? TONY! I said shut the hell up!

Well I'm heading home now, so... what? You're working tomorrow morning? ... Tomorrow, in four hours, whatever, same thing. Don't get snappy with me, woman, I just wanted to... to... huh? Well, you know what? Fine... I'm going to go home with Tony and Bob here and... oh, you don't care? Whatever, you're being no fun at all... I was hoping you'd tell me how sexy you think I am so we can...

So we can...

Hello? Baby? ... She hung up.

The End

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