Something drove me crazy about her... I won't lie, I was absolutely confused....Some made me have desires to write again, and she actually spoke to my child like a human, unlike the rest of the girls I've talked to, making me think my child was a mistake, she made me feel like she was born to prove I was a good man. I slightly believed her, but I told her I didn't. She was there for me all the time, and I'm not exactly sure how to react about this whole situation. But I might be falling, already, and it's driving me crazy a little bit...
"daddy?" Payton called out for me as my eyes shot open.
"papaw told me to wake you up."
"hi daddy, you sleep good?"
"yes" when in reality, I slept horrible thinking all night about a girl.
I pulled myself out of the bed, reading a text from Libby. Those texts made my day so much more than she knew. But she didn't know those things, only the weak things about me I guess. Like me crying over a death of a girlfriend, I don't really know why she put up with that.. I guess she understands, but she doesn't. I looked around my room, it was 10. Normally I slept til around 12 but when it was just me and my dad in the house, I had to wake up before the day was almost over, plus my father believed that I wasn't suppose to sleep even that long. Six was the latest he slept during the day, and it drove me absolutely nuts. But he was still in military mode, from the marines. And Libby doesn't know, but that's the main reason I'm holding back from being in a relationship with her... She just didn't know yet. Well she knew about the marines, just not the fear about leaving, causing me to hurt more because part of me was so in love and I wasn't sure how to go about it..
"hey can we hang out today?" she asked.
"I'm not totally sure haha"
Witn that I left to go pick her up at the mall. She told her parents she was with sydney because apparentlySydney never got in trouble, and she never got in trouble while with Sydney. She got in my truck and smiled that little smile she always does. It was quiet, we talked more on texts and phone calls then in person, which sounds bad because we had sex. But I didn't care. She was alright in person, and she was alright to be around. A couple minutes later she broke the silence,
"I have a lot on my mind"
"there go your stupid walls again"
I looked at her for a slight second, she hated the walls I put up around her, but It was so much easier in person. I kept thinking of the marines, being in a relationship, being jealous easily, everything.
"sometimes I think of us, and us together, as you know, together.."
"I feel like I'd complicate it"
"what are you talking about Steven?"
"I'm a jealous freak, oh and I get mad over stupid things"
"and the marines"
"I thought so"
It got silent, almost like I broke her heart. I stopped the car, it was snowing, and I looked outside.
"I love you"
"I love you too Steven"
We got out of the car, the snow was getting heavier as I looked at her, she leaned against the car, I looked into the eyes I fell in love with, even when I didn't know who she was. I was in love with her, when we never met. But some reason, her eyes sort it had mystery, like lust. I knew I had that too, the way she looked into my entire soul, as I touched her face. My nose touched hers, as my eyes closed knowing hers closed too. My body touched hers and felt heat quicker than ever, I felt her move and run from me like those stupid love movies but I couldn't help to run back after her. She was laughing so loud, and kept giggling like a 4 year old. I took snow in my hand and threw it at her as it started to melt on her jacket. She stopped and pushed me onto the ground covered in snow. I breathed softly. The heat from my breath blew on her face. She looked at me once again, as I felt her lips on mine, feeling the cool lips on mine, with the heat escaping our mouths. I rubbed my hand from her waist to her neck as I held her face, she pulled away as my whole body got cold again as she started walking, I followed her like a helpless puppy.
"let's get hot coco"
"okay but Libby.."
We ran inside from being cold the lady smiled at us, covered in snow.
"do you want hot chocholate?"she asked
"yes! Two" Libby replied.
She was shaking like a leaf from being cold, I picked up a cookie because Libby always told me if anyone wanted to make her day, to buy her a cookie. I put it on the counter as she put a candy cane on the counter, because it was my favorite candy. She made my day, just as easily as I was trying to make hers. I watched her lip sexuality and I know she wasn't trying to be sexy at all. The lady smiled at us and rang up our items as we sat down by the fireplace and looked down at all the snow on the ground. We sat at a table with candles, I felt her foot hit mine, then slide up my leg. I got chills from being cold and he heat going through my entire body. Everytime I was with her, I got temptations, it didn't bother me. But I felt like a sex drive freak. Maybe monster, or maybe even an addict, but a addict of love. Which I couldn't help, because her blonde hair that sometimes waved was the perfect shade of blonde. Her eyes were the bluest blue of eyes I've ever fallen for, and that cute nose I have desires of poking to annoy her. Her lips were the perfect amount of fullness to kiss, and her teethahead that precious gap, even if she's worried about how they look most of the time, her body was perfect in everyway. Meaning her curves were like a model to me, even if she didn't believe me, well I didn't tell her. I thought it every second.
"yeah" I said, coming out of daydreams of taking complete advantage of her body.
"am I hott ?"
"I need get called that"
"what do you mean?"
"its always cute and adorable and I want to be hott and sexy to someone"
But little did she know, I had thoughts of her sexy body, every second.