Cow Teacher

Right, to start this off I'll begin with a cow. She isn't the worst teacher I've heard of, but she's a cow.

This cow tells people off...

a) for looking like they're about to draw on their hand

b) for being in hospital for four weeks and therefore not doing homework

c) for making noises (not!)

d) turning round to look at the thing she was pointing at out the window a couple of moments ago

She says "stop talking" at least twenty-four times a minute (we've tallied). She accuses people of all sorts of things, none of them true. She picks on people, and loads ridiculous amounts of homework onto us, expects us to know things we can't possibly with her teaching, explains simple things in such a vague or unclear way that we don't know what she's talking about, and then when I ask my brother he tells me and I understand straight away. She also refuses to call my friend by her name, getting the principle vowel wrong every time. She can keep us behind five minutes after the last bell rang, just to talk some rubbish about being disappointed in our efforts (not our behaviour, our efforts), and that makes us late for PE, which the PE staff can get ratty about.

She gets into a rage if we don't understand our homework, and says she doesn't care if we fail our exams, it's our fault because we aren't doing the work. I can't say how much I want to scream that I don't care either and I'd rather just not do anything, but actually I do care about my exams, and I'm ashamed of it, I regret to say.

Okay, maybe we play her up quite a bit. After all, we aren't scared of her at all. She can't do more than give us red forms, which I'm not scared of concerning this teacher. We do play up, but not until she gets ratty. Then we take a joy in playing her up even more. Gives us power to see her shout. She shouldn't rise. But she does. And we should be kinder and not play her up. But really, if she wasn't so unreasonable, we wouldn't play her up at all. Other teachers we don't dare, or else we wouldn't think of it. But this cow teacher disturbs even my not usually rebellious spirit. I shouldn't. Our class shouldn't.

But, hey! I spent hours researching this project for her lesson, and she took one look and accused me of copying and pasting! Accused me! Me! I've never copied and pasted in my life, and she knows it, surely. It's spite, and suspicion, and we all detest her. I haven't tried to make my writing neat, or grammatically correct, or my work well done (though first I make sure I understand it all through), since then. And she hasn't even said anything about my bad work since, either, though she couldn't resist jawing me for a long and detailed essay. I said "Cow!" loudly when she was nearly out of earshot (worst thing I've done in ages), because that's what she is.

There, I've had my moan, and I feel loads better for having got it off my chest. And no names mentioned, not that she'll ever find this, so I'm nice and safe too. Not that I'd wish to get her into trouble. I'm not generally a mean person, until they rouse up my worst feelings. Just wish I could get away from her teaching me. Three years is a long time.

The End

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