Or 'Miaow' if you'd prefer but in person I shall stick to hello.
Could you please explain to me just why it is that everytime I walk past your lovely bin you sit up and hiss?
You don't do it to anyone else.
Not Mr Palmer, your owner. Not Agnes up the road who kicks at you. Not my brother who I know pulled your tail once. Not the small children two doors down who run past you screaming, the postman who smells a bit strange and not my dog who I'm pretty sure wants to eat you.
Who says "Hello" to you every time I walk past and once gave you refuge in my kitchen the day the Palmer's were out and there was that thunderstorm and also started a petition for that poor cat that was put in a wheelie bin.
I am most hurt by your disloyalty.
- Your disgruntled neighbour and life-long cat-lover.