I gave up with a loud sign and put the piano lid down. Even though my mum forked all that money out for me to learn different instruments, I was struggling to use my knowledge of them to put together a decent song.
“Need more coffee?” Chrissie asked from the doorway, I nodded a silent yes and gulped the disgusting machine-coffee down, not caring that it burnt my tongue as it did. I saw Chrissie frowning at the balled up music sheets I'd thrown into the bin.
“They're all as crap as this one,” I muttered by way of explanation. She reached down and unscrewed one, looking over the badly put-together chord sequences for different instruments.
“You know how to play violin?” she asked, raising an eyebrow. Again I just gave a nod as I finished off the dregs of the coffee and contemplated raiding my bag for pills. But I already knew there were none left and I'd need more soon to survive Rody.
“Mum had me learn violin, piano and flute when I was growing up, she thought that if I was going to obsessed with music, it would be the respectable kind,” I couldn't help but laugh after I'd said the words.
“And of all those you picked bass?” she asked. I shrugged.
“In secondary school my friend was putting together a band. He needed a bass and I offered to learn it. I don't really care which instrument I play,” I explained.
“Well, judging by these sheets, your most promising ones are the piano one,” She put down a few on the table and then looked at my most recent attempt with clinical eyes.
“You know if you mixed this with...” she trailed off as she walked back to the table. I stood up slowly, grabbed the new sheets and looked to the one she pointed at.
“This one, I think the sequences could work together, use the older ones chorus and the new ones verses. Obviously I don't know what lyrics you had in mind for them, but the others should be here soon so see what they think. It's not perfect but then no song starts out that way. I think you've done as much as you can on your own,” Chrissie said, sending me an encouraging smile. Was it that obvious how much this was bothering me? Probably. I picked up the old scrunched up paper and put it with the new.
“Any idea when they get here?” I asked and she held up a finger to indicate one second. Then headed outside where I eventually heard her greeting the others. Now I just needed to figure out how to tell them I wrote....something. Jaimie was the first to walk in and I tried not to think about what I'd overheard. Robin followed, undoubtedly aware something was going on between us.
“I wrote a song....kind of, it's not very good at the moment...” I trailed off and held the pieces of paper out, having scribbled out the unwanted parts. I placed them on the table and everyone sat on the sofas. I tried not to sweat as I saw Jaimie and Robin studying my work. I imagine they wanted to ask about the other instruments I'd thrown in there like Chrissie but didn't. Instead Jaimie picked up a nearby pencil and began writing in changes and annotations. Robin pulled out her own notepad and jotted down what I aimgine were lyrics.
“Ermm...” I began and they both looked up at me expectantly, “So...you guys like it?” I finally asked.
“I've seen worse,” Jaimie said with a shrug and continued fiddling with the guitar music.
“Until I actually hear how it sounds I won't be able to make sure these lyrics work. Can you pre-record the piano bits for us? I know Rody will want us to do that other song for today,” Tobin said. I blinked a few times before I realized they didn't think my music was complete crap like I did.
“Yeah, sure, I can do that,” I replied.
“Good,” Robin replied. Then Rody walked in and I put the bits of paper into my bag for later.