There was silence in the car as we were driven back to the house. I leant my head against the cool glass and sighed quietly. What was I going to do with the box? There had once been a time when its contents were my most prized possessions.
The drive passed quickly and I was sure Kyle and Robin had noticed my behaviour. I got out of the car when we pulled up outside the house. Robin was the first through the front door. She headed into the living room. When I went in, she was looking at the box. Crap! I thought I'd taken that upstairs!
I jumped in front of her and picked up the box before she could open it. That wouldn't have been good... She watched me curiously as I rushed upstairs. I heard her talking to Kyle quietly. Probably about me. I shut the door to my room and put the box on the bed. I locked the door and leant against it.What was I going to do?
I opened the box and lay down on the bed, letting the smell of leather fill the room. It was still as comforting to me as it had been two years ago. That certainly wasn't good.
I opened my eyes and it was late afternoon. I must have fallen asleep. Beside me the box was still open. I pulled the charger out of my phone and turned it on. There was one message from Robin that I'd got about an hour ago.
Coming down any time soon? it read.
I shook my head. I wasn't going downstairs until I'd cleared my head. I sat up and looked inside the box, knowing what would be there waiting for me. I closed my eyes and sighed. I reached inside the box and pulled out a pair of leather handcuffs. The short chain connected the two wrist restraints still glittered.
I looked at the rest of the contents of the box. Everything seemed to be accounted for, just as I'd left it. Whips, chains, riding crops, along with all the rest of it, reminding me of my days as a sadomasochist. I only stopped it all because my mum found out, and Carter sided with her.
I closed my eyes, dropped the cuffs into the box and slammed it shut before all the memories came flooding back. But it was too late. They fluttered through my mind. I closed my eyes and dropped my head into my hands.
There was a light knock at the door. I quickly slid the box under the bed. I unlocked the door and opened it. Robin was stood there.
"Are you okay?" she asked quietly, looking up through her lashes.
I shrugged. "I guess."
"What's wrong?" she asked, though she probably knew it had something to do with a certain little box...
"Nothing important," I said, giving her a reassuring smile.
"You just on your man-period?" she joked.
I couldn't help the genuine smile that spread across my lips.