Rayn: Look, it's scaredMature

By the time a couple of months had passed, a few things had changed. Whether they were for the better or not, I can't really say. I s'pose it depends on your point of view. Anyways, Phil and Damien had moved in together and seemed to be pretty loved up - last I heard they were even looking for a better apartment somewhere that wasn't in a shitty part of town. Kyle had gotten more used to the drag thing, and I was getting more used to the sex. I still wasn't exactly sure if I actually enjoyed it, though. I preferred topping, but I'm not stupid - I'd caught on pretty quick that things wouldn't work out so brilliantly if I insisted on keeping that up. If I'm honest, I think the only reason I even agree to sex is to keep Kyle happy. Not the best of reasons, really, is it?


Kyle was at work by the time I woke up, and I wouldn't have any, uh, business of my own until later on. I wandered around the apartment aimlessly for a while, before having a shower. As I went back to my aimless wandering in my towel, I half considered what to do all day while Kyle worked. I flopped onto the couch and dragged the laptop up onto the coffee table to stalk Facebook for a while. Needless to say, that got kinda boring kinda quickly, and aside from getting dressed, there wasn't much else to do.

That was kinda when I figured I'd go into town and do some shopping or something.


It wasn't too long before I'd gotten tired of walking around in heels. What? I can hardly go try on girly stuff if I'm not dressed up for it, can I?

Without thinking, I staggered off towards the nearest Starbucks to grab a coffee and sit down so I could get those fucking shoes off. I didn't really register which Starbucks I'd walked into until I reached the counter.

"What can I get you?" Matt asked, the stomach churning look of some kind of vague recognition on his face as he spoke. We hadn't really seen each other since I'd shot him - every time I'd seen him around, I'd made a break for the nearest shop to hide in. I couldn't help but glance at the scar on his temple.

"Just a coffee, thanks," I muttered.

"What's your name?" he asked, turning to make my coffee.

"Honey," I replied, watching him carefully.

"Honey? Weird name." I shrugged it off, glad I hadn't picked a more obvious drag name. "You look like someone I used to know. You don't have a brother called Rayn, do you?" Oh, fuck. I tried not to let the sudden nervousness chewing at my inside show on my face as I flashed him a small smile, shaking my head.

"And you said Honey's a weird name."

"He laughed a little, "I figure he must've picked it for himself. Either that or his mom was on drugs. Wouldn't surprise me, to be honest." I felt my fists clench at that. I forced myself to stay calm and pushed some money across the counter.

"Keep the change," I said, walking off with my coffee to score one of the couches.

I could feel his eyes on me as I sat down and kicked my shoes off. Doing my best to relax as much as I could, I just stayed there, determined to not let him bother me. I mean, wasn't that kinda what me and Kyle had argued about before? That I hadn't looked after myself when he'd showed up?

"You sure you're not related to him?" Matt's voice made me jump, just as I'd gotten about as relaxed as I was going to in there. I looked up at him.

"If I am, I've never heard of him."

"He gave me this, y'know," he told me, pointing at the scar.

I faked my surprise as best I could, looking up at it. "What did he do?"

"Shot me."

"That's terrible. Why'd he do that?" I winced internally at how fake I sounded. My acting skills were never what you would call competent. He shrugged, and I couldn't tell if he was seeing through my awful acting or not. "He must've had a reason for it. Unless he was off his face or something," I smiled kinda shakily.

"Either way, the next time I see him, I'll kick the shit out of him." Double fuck. Then again, I s'pose I'd rather that than him pressing charges. Mind you... I'm still not a fan of being beaten up.

"Charming," I let out a nervous giggle.

"He deserves it. Can I have your number?" What after telling me you wanna kick the shit out of me? Even if it wasn't me he wanted to kick the shit out of, I still don't think he'd be getting my number.

"Rather forward, don't you think?" I asked, feeling a little flustered as I tried to think of something better to say to get him to go away. He just grinned a little. I felt my face flush.

"What can I say? You're cute, and I'd like to get to know you better," his grin evened out into a smile.

"I'm taken, I'm afraid." I couldn't quite get an apologetic smile onto my lips, though.

"The pretty ones always are," he chuckled a little. "Well, you know where I am if things don't work out." I nodded a little. "See you later, Honey."

Fuck me, that was way, way too close. I downed the rest of my coffee, ignoring it scalding my throat as it went down, and the pain in my feet as I slipped the shoes back on. I rushed out, forgetting that Matt would probably notice me running out of there like a dog with its tail between its legs.

I stopped running after I'd turned the corner into the next street. I looked around the unfamiliar part of town. I'd seen it before, of course, but given that it's just a residential area, I'd never really thought to explore it.

Still, being lost is something I'm good at. Walking up the road, I looked around a bit, spotting a gang of kids hanging around on their bikes, smoking and thinking they looked cool. I fixed my gaze on the sidewalk before me, not wanting to attract their attention. One of them wolf whistled, and I looked around, trying to see who they were whistling at. There was no one else around, and I blushed a little as a couple of them laughed.

I could hear them following me, and I tried to walk faster, but there's only so fast you can go in heels, y'know? It didn't take long for them to catch up with me. One of them slapped my ass and chuckled as I spun around, irritated.

"You're hot," he leered.

"And I'm not interested," I hissed, crossing the road to get away from them. I knew vaguely which direction I needed to be going in, and in an effort to get away quicker, I ducked down an alley, instead of sticking to main roads. Which wasn't the best decision in the world, really.

Because they followed me down there too. And then we were out of sight of the houses.


The one that had slapped my ass sauntered up to me, backing me up against a wall. Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck. I felt the bricks of the wall pressing into my back and my heart having a little spaz attack. He put his hands on my hips, and pushed his lips against mine. I froze for a moment, not sure what to do. I pushed him back, or at least, I tried to, and turned my head away.

"Aw, loosen up, babe. Don't be so fuckin' frigid." One of his hands left my hip and drifted down to my crotch slowly. I nearly had a heart attack as he put his hand up under my skirt and felt something different to what he was expecting. He stepped back, a disgusted look on his face. Fuck. "Gross. It's a fucking tranny." The atmosphere changed immediately. It wasn't exactly friendly before, but it was completely hostile now. He pulled a knife from his pocket and pressed it against my neck. The others pulled my shopping bags from my hand and scattered their contents across the alley floor. Their laughter as they debated what to do with me rattled inside my brain, and I closed my eyes, willing someone to walk past and stop them.

"Cut its hair off. Teach it a lesson," one of them suggested. The one with the knife flipped me around and grabbed a fistful of hair. He tugged on it hard as he dragged the knife through it, dropping each handful of hair on the ground beside me until it was all cut short, ragged an uneven. The encouraging laughter of the others seemed to be the only thing I could hear anymore as they turned me back round, one hand pinning me against the bricks, the other still holding the knife threateningly. I stared at the floor, too scared to do anything. I could feel myself shaking and kinda felt like I needed to pee.

"Aw look, it's scared," one of them taunted, landing a rough slap across my face, forcing me to look up. "Maybe when we're done, it'll know better than to dress up like a freak," he grinned. I just closed my eyes and hoped that whatever they were gonna do to me, they'd do it quickly. 


The End

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