Being back with Damien... I didn’t know whether it meant we were getting back together... Or if we’d even split up for that matter. But I didn’t care. It didn’t matter what it meant by him wanting me to find him and not Phil, I was just so fucking relieved to be near him again. How typical is that? We were perfectly capable of working this out on our own yet my dumbass mother felt the need to interfere and cart me off to the nut house.
I was half asleep with my head just about resting on top of Damien’s. I could’ve happily stayed like that forever but Damien woke up. I let out a baby yawn, humming as he snuggled up to me.
"I should probably go back and get some gas"
He whined slightly and I kissed the top of his head. I don’t want to move either, gorgeous, but we can’t stay here. Especially when you haven’t had a drink for days.
“Dun wanna move” he mumbled.
“Good thing you’re staying here, then” I said, laughing slightly.
He wrapped his arms around my waist and I cuddled him, biting back a sigh. I was worried for him, plus I kind of needed the alone time to pick up the nerve to tell Damien I wouldn’t be around for him that much since I was being sent to the loony bin. I’d promised him I wouldn’t go anywhere and what was I doing? Just fucking leaving him to deal with everything on his own while I got poked and prodded by doctors and psychiatrists. I tutted when I saw he’d fallen asleep and tried to wriggle free, earning myself plenty of complaints from Damien. He didn’t let go of me, either.
“I’ll be back before you know it, gorgeous” Especially if you’re asleep.
“You only just got here”
“I know. But you need a drink as well as gas” I’d bought a bottle of water for him but I’d kind of drunk it all on the walk along the freeway.
He pouted a little, biting my finger when I prodded his lips.
“Ow” I giggled.
He let go and curled up on the seat. “Hurry up”
“Go to sleep, I’ll be back before you wake up” I said, kissing the top of his head.
He hummed and I made sure he was at least half asleep before I left.
I took my time getting the water and gas. I still hadn’t really picked up the courage to tell him by the time I got back but I knew I’d regret it if I didn’t tell him. He was asleep when I got back and I almost didn’t want to wake him. But then my paranoia kicked in a little and I thought “what if he’s not asleep? What if he’s passed out from dehydration?” so, y’know, I kinda decided to wake him up.
"Wake up, beautiful" I said, kissing the top of his head.
He stirred and I smiled, earning a sleepy smile back. I handed him a bottle of water, watching as he sat up and downed it. He finished it pretty quickly and I handed him another bottle, playing with his hair as he downed that too.
"Thanks" he said.
He flashed me a smile and I mirrored it.
"We should probably get going, then? I probably stink" he said, laughing slightly.
I chuckled. "I got a room at a motel for tonight"
"That Riverview place"
He played along, sort of pretending to know where I meant and I planted a baby of a kiss on his lips. He kissed back and I slid out of the car, sorting out the gas before sliding into the driver’s seat.
"Thought you couldn't drive"
He laughed a little. "I'll drive"
"I don't mind" I smiled.
"If you crash and wreck my car, I'll kill you" he chuckled, making me giggle.
"I'll try not to"
We buckled ourselves in and I set off on the way back to Riverview. I’d finally picked up the nerve to tell Damien but when I looked over at him, he was asleep. C’mon, Damien, don’t do this to me. He woke up long enough to clamber into bed and I snuggled up to him, enjoying the closeness.
"Damien?" I asked quietly, hoping he was asleep and that I wouldn’t spoil the moment.
"There's something I need to tell you"
"What is it?" he asked sleepily.
"Mom's paying me for to go to a psychiatric institute"
He woke up a little bit, frowning. "Why?"
"She found out about everything that's happened"
"But... that means I won't see you”
"I know" I sighed.
I felt the happy feeling of our reunion jump out of the window, replacing itself with this ugly emo mood. I cuddled Damien more, knowing he’d no doubt be blaming himself.
"I'm sorry I've screwed you up so bad" he said quietly.
I kissed his shoulder. "It's not your fault, gorgeous"
"Well you'd hardly have ended up like this if we hadn't gotten together"
"Don't ever think that. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me" I said, cuddling him even more.
He arched his eyebrow slightly.
"I've never been as happy as I am with you, Damien"
He leant his head on my chest and I could tell he didn’t quite believe me.
"I mean it. I fucking love you so much. Just being around you cheers me up"
I hummed as he kissed my chest, trying to ignore the slight tickle.
“I love you” he said.
“I love you too”
“I don’t want you to have to go” he sighed.
“I don’t want to go, either”
He flashed a small smile at me. "We could always try running away again"
"Look how well that went last time, though" I chuckled.
"Instead of travelling across America again we should just get on a plane and go somewhere else"
"We had money last time, though" my efforts were kind of wasted, though, since he was too sleepy to really care about that. I kissed him quickly. “We’ll work something out in the morning”