The day of the porn awards snuck up on me. I’d been able to forget about it with Benny around. I was kept busy walking him and playing and socialising him with other dogs in the area. When I realised what day it was, I refused to leave the bed, sulking.
“Don’t sulk,” Kyle said, cuddling me.
"Dun wanna go,” I mumbled sulkily.
"Why not?" he asked, playing with my hair.
"Because I can pretend you don't do porn most of the time, but now I'm gonna have to meet people you've..." I trailed off with a shudder. It wasn’t just that, I’d have to be nice to these people too. People that bit by bit stole my husband from me and turned him into wank material for weirdos that couldn’t get themselves laid.
He just hugged me tighter. "But on the plus side, it's a trip to San Francisco."
"Can't I stay and look after Benny?" I whined.
"I want you to be there, though."
I sniffled a little, "I don't like it,” I told him burying my head in his neck. I complained all morning, while I was packing, on the way to the airport, on the plane, on the way to the hotel and until I got a nice big hit of smack I was still sulking. Kyle did his best to give me all cuddles and love, but I sulked off into the bathroom when he actually started getting nervous. How could you get nervous about this? It was just fucking weird that they even had porn let alone awards for being in it. When it was time to leave, I demanded a piggy back, burying my head in his neck when he obliged.
Once we were there I insisted on sitting in his lap. He was mine and people had to know it, right? Kyle flashed me a smile, even though I was ignoring everyone. He did his best to introduce me to a few people, putting in a lot of effort to introduce me to a drag queen who was apparently lovely. I ignored nearly all of them, and only vaguely paid attention to the drag queen, curious to see what he was wearing.
I think he realised I was just going to stay in limpet mode all night and went back to cuddling me, pretending not to be nervous again when they started announcing winners. I buried my head in his neck again, pretending I was somewhere else. I heard something about newcomers being mentioned and Kyle sat up kinda straight. I looked up at him, almost praying that he wasn’t gonna win.
And then he did. He planted a kiss on my lips and slipped out from underneath me to go up and get his award. I sat there sulking, only half listening to his little acceptance speech. He thanked everyone and ‘especially my gorgeous husband’, which just made me sulk more. Why was he thanking me when I’d done nothing but try and get him into any career that wasn’t him having sex with other people?
When he got back, he gave me this big old smooch and he was all snuggles and excitement. I tried to be happy for him, but I just couldn’t. I had no idea how I was supposed to be happy for him when all I could think about was how much I hated him for fucking other people. I just put my head on his shoulder and stayed quietly like that for the rest of the awards.
I was dragged off to the after party for a while, and I tried to stick around with him, but I just couldn’t do it. I slinked off to the bar where someone that was already off his face on coke offered me a line if I went with him to the bathrooms. Coke would cheer me up, hell it would even have me celebrating with him, if I could find him again. So I followed this guy and was pushed into the big disabled cubicle where there were a couple others already cutting up lines. Once I got some of it inside of me, I was happy to talk with them. I hardly even remembered why I was there; all I knew was there was a seemingly endless flow of cocaine and god knows what else and people were coming and going as they pleased. I was the only one that didn’t know anyone there, but it didn’t matter anymore.
I looked up as someone new came into the cubicle and saw none other than my husband standing there. He sort of looked like he wanted to join in and I wasn’t about to argue, I was having fun now. So he knelt down and I cut him a line, feeling his lips on mine once he was done with it. I kissed back, giving him a couple more lines before I felt his hand in my crotch, groping at me.
“Let’s get out of here,” he said. I wrapped my limbs around him, waving goodbye to whoever it was still in the cubicle. He carried me back to the hotel, not minding that I was biting his neck and shoulder all the way there. He palmed me and I growled at him, intent on giving him a hickey before we were even back in our room. He didn’t complain about it, kicking the door shut behind us and stripping me of my clothes. I pulled his shirt off and undid his pants, pushing them down. He ran his hand through my hair, watching as I dropped to my knees to wrap my mouth around him.
He moaned, still playing with my hair as I started humming, just to drive him crazy. When I came up for air, he pressed his lips against mine, pulling me up with him. I flopped down on the bed, making sure he came with me as he littered my neck with kisses. I ground my hips into his, half moaning, half growling as he palmed me again, wordlessly begging him to fuck me already. He didn’t exactly argue with that.