22:21. Mood: Confused, fed up.
today was the day most teenagers never experience. The day of my mothers funeral. Maybe I should sound distressed at the thought, but I am not. Maybe this is the source of my confusion. I guess you could never know what it would be like, to be brought up by just you father all your life, to be told your mother was dead all your life, just to discover she'd spent that time in a mental asylum.
Was my father ashamed of her, my mother? Is that why he lied? I will never know. He too, died, when I was just fourteen. All I have to say to you diary is; why life? Life is a lie. Nobody ever lives a totally honest life. And most people never achieve what they want to either. I could spend years and years chasing my dreams, and yeah, maybe one day I'll achieve them... but will anybody ever remember that diary? No. Because they would be dead too. Life is just a giant let down diary. Actions have consequences, but even those consequences are not long lasting not really. Nothing is permanent is it?
So, I have decided, now is the time, whilst I can still blame adolescence, to be reckless. Life is short and meaningless... why not try to spice it up, even if you do fail?