Cantankerous Hell Cabbage

Below the courtyard of the Blunderworld where sock puppets fly on severed hands, there is a cabbage in the meat spire. A giant cabbage that grows slightly every time it is fed upon, and the more it grows, the blander and less nourishing it gets. And, curiously, it's flavor also begins to remind one of dishwashing soap. The lemon kind. 

You mean you haven't tasted it?  Gosh.  Some people just don't appreciate the stranger delicacies in life.

Anyway...the Blunderworld's baleful swirling light bakes the cabbage in sulphuric heat and its leafy layers have been bleached a sickly yellow-blue. 

Its purpose is to feed the ravenous demon bunnies and in turn supply hordes of laughing, gibbering demon predators with valued sustenance. These predators know how to play Chess but don't ponder the deeper meaning of the pieces on the board.

Do they realize they are Pawns? Do they fancy themselves Kings, Bishops? Perhaps even pieces not included in the game set, like the little Scotty dog from Monopoly. But does this matter as long as they are fed? 

Since it is in fact a meat spire I don't understand why they don't simply pick some of the meat already there instead of hunting more demon bunnies. That is the way of the Blunderworld. 

If you were to see the cabbage, even touch or taste it, you would understand why it both does and doesn't belong. As it grows and watches the parody of earthly nature unfold, it somehow dreams of violence. It also dreams of the Terror Turnip, but that is a discussion best saved for another time. You are already starved on sanity, and the Tale Of The Terror Turnip would really hurl you over the edge.

We could, however, speak of the Accursed Cupcake as Magnapinna furtively tries to discern whether any of your brains are worth eating. He's reading Pride And Prejudice at the moment. It appeals to his longing to be in another era, because he is from the South Atlantic after all and still considers himself a Southern gentlesquid. Albeit one who will torture you with bad poetry before eating your brain.

Okay, I'm just going to stop now.  

The End

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