Sooooo I tried writing this as a poem but it wasn't really working out. SO here's a something or other :3
Sometimes, I get mean. Like fighting dog, been chained my whole life,biting the hand that feeds me mean. i know you don't understand why there are entire weeks where I just hate everything. And let me tell you- I really don't fucking understand it either. It's just something that happens, and as of late, something that's happening a helluva lot more frequently than it should.
Look, I know I'm really fucking hard to love sometimes....okay,so most of the time. And I know I never even pretend to try to make it easy for you.And I guess I should say I'm sorry, but for fuck's sake, I'm really not. I mean, this is why you love me- my complete inability to have any sort of stability of the heart and mind. I mean, I understand you. When no one else even tries to give two fucks about you, I always do. I'm so angry and depressed and just fucking insane allthe damn time but that's why me and you go together so well and I'm truly sorry if I'm ever horrible enough for you to forget that, but I just really need you to know that I never ever could forget that.
Sometimes, i punch you in the face,(And I'm really happy because most of the time you just kinda take it in stride and I love you for it), and sometimes I scream at you through emails and texts nad messages and a whole bunch of other indirect ways to spread bullshit. But,honestly, I'm gonna say that its your fault for being as stubborn as I am and just being so damn incredible to the point where I.just.can't.even.... Gah, it's your fault that I'm so mean and brutal, and just overall really fucking violent because I love you and that wasn't suppose to happen and I blame you, but its okay because I blame you for everything especially the fact that my heart is beating like a million miles and hour because YOU. you're you and I just can't handle that...I really,really can't.
I know I'm a terrible person who beats you and yells at you and always argues and never gives up, but I just want you to know that I love you with every fiber of my being and that even when I'm being mean, you can always count on me to be there for you. I just wanted to remind you of that, just in case you forgot. x0x0