When I've calmed down, Alex sits beside me and holds me in a hug. I don't say anything, apart from moaning a couple of times that I want a cigarette, and Alex only speaks to tell me he's not letting me smoke. A phone rings and I look up as Caleb reaches down and pulls his mobile out of his jeans.
I don't really listen to what's said, all I know is that it results in Hadley appearing. Caleb lets him in and I barely look up as he walks in. He goes straight to the corner of the room, sits on the floor and hugs his waist.
A bubble of laughter rises in me, but it dies before it reaches my lips. How fucked up can this get? I want to go and hug him, but I can't seem to make myself move. Caleb kind of stands there awkwardly, not knowing what to do. I lick my lips and try to make my voice work.
"I'm sorry, Hads," I mumble. He doesn't say anything, hugging himself tighter and I bite my lip slightly. "I didn't mean to fuck everything up more..." I don't know what to say. The only thing I can seem to think of is just to say sorry over and over.
"I'm gonna be sick," Hadley says quietly. Caleb sits with him and rubs his back, talking softly.
"Hey, shh, you're not gonna be sick." If he's gonna be sick, wouldn't it be a good idea to move him to the bathroom?
I dislodge Alex's arms from around me and walk over to Hadley.
"If he's going to be sick, then he should be in the bathroom," I say, offering him my hand to help him up.
"This is my fault, isn't it?" he says, still talking quietly.
"No, it's mine. C'mon. Bathroom." He shakes his head and I sigh, sitting down next to him.
"I promised I'd stop them if things got too far. I-I said I'd get in the way. But I didn't. I just let them..."
"I shouldn't have snapped."
"I saw it coming and I didn't do anything," he mumbles and I put my arm around him, hugging him the same way Alex was hugging me. He shakes his head again and starts breathing faster.
"Take it easy, buddy," Caleb says, worried. I take my arms back from around him and kneel in front of him. Putting my hands on his shoulders, I try to get some kind of eye contact as I talk.
"Hadley, it's okay," I say firmly, lifting one hand to brush his hair back, "it'll be okay. I'll do my best to fix this."
"I don't wanna go back," he says, hugging his waist even tighter.
"You don't have to. None of us are going to make you." Hadley's eyes close and he bites his lip. I kiss his forehead and pull him to his feet, pulling him over to the toilet. Caleb stands in the doorway, looking worried as I aim Hadley's mouth over the bowl, rubbing his back.
"I'm gonna go call... Y'know, so they don't panic or anything," Caleb says and I just nod. He opens his mouth to say something else, but stops. I glance at him.
"It's the middle of the night, don't you think they're gonna worry?"
"Probably, but that's why you're going to call and tell them he's okay. But maybe don't tell them we're here... Cayden will probably come over and try to get him back again." And we all know how that ended last time.
"I was just gonna tell them he was with me," he says in this kinda grumpy tone and I'm tempted to snap and tell him to fuck off, but I bite it back and shrug, turning my attention back to Hadley. Caleb walks back into the other room and Hadley groans.
"I don't feel so good."
"I know, I'm sorry," I murmur, "I shouldn't have let you get so wasted." But I did, because I'm a fucking idiot. But he shakes his head.
"Booze doesn't make me feel sick." I frown.
"Then why're you feeling sick?"
"I don't know. It started when you and Cayden were shouting at each other." I bite my lip, feeling more and more responsible for this mess by the minute. He shuts his eyes and takes a deep breath.
"Is there- is there anything I can do that might help?"
"A new stomach would be nice," he says, a tiny smile pulling his lips up.
"I'll get on it right away. Anything else?" I smile back slightly.
"Something to knock me out," he groans. I sigh and kiss his cheek.
"I dunno about that, but I can get you a bed." He hums.
"I'll be back in a few minutes," I promise and get up. I tell Alex to look after him while I get us a room.