Cayden: "Pretty things"Mature

“I’m not psychic” I said, a little stressily. Can you blame me? I’d been wandering around London all day, I even took the tube, and what do I get? Maxxie calling me three hours later doubting my ability to find things.

I heard him sigh. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to freak you out by vanishing.”

“Where were you?” I asked, already calmed down.

“On the roof.”

Well there you go, that’s why I couldn’t find him. I’ve never been able to find people if they’re on a roof. “That’s cheating”

Maxxie laughed slightly. “Apologies. How can I make it up to you?”

“Buy me something pretty”

"Buy you something pretty... like what?"

I shrugged even though he couldn't see me. "Surprise me"

"Mmm, okay. Where abouts are you?"


There was a pause, followed by a crash and a shitload of swearing. “Remind me not to get dressed when I’m trying to hold a phone.”

I laughed then remembered my situation. “Remind me not to take the tube like ever again”

“Oh dear God. What’s the name of the station you’re at? I’ll come get you.”

“Uh… Let me just find out from…someone” I said in parts as I tried to work out where I was.

I heard Maxxie trying not to laugh over the phone as I flagged down someone who looked like they weren’t going to slap me for talking to them and asked what station it was.

“Barking, apparently”

“Right. Just…find a bench, I’ll come get you.”

“One bench, coming up”

“Good stuff. Maybe I’ll get you something pretty on the way.”

“You better or I’m going walking” I said, trying not to laugh.

“You wouldn’t dare.” Bless, he was trying to be threatening.

“Mmm, hello there bench. Wave to my ass as it walks past you”

“Bye bye pretty things.”

“Bye bye London”

“Cayyyy” he whined and I mimicked him.


“I’m looking for pretty things. Stay in London.”


“You didn’t say you were staying in London.”

“I’m acquainting this bench with my ass, I think you’re safe”

“I’m sure they’ll get on well. I hope you like my pretty things.”

“I’ve already seen your pretty things. They could be better” I smirked.

“Don’t talk about my ass cheeks that way” he said, pretending  to be offended.

“Who said I meant your ass cheeks?”

Maxxie laughed. “Go on then. What did you mean?”

“I’m sure the lovely old lady sat next to me wouldn’t want to hear but I’m sure you can imagine”

“Huh. Then I hope you like these pretty things more.”

“Just make sure they’re pretty” I laughed.

“Mmm, we’ll see. The rate you were going, I was headed for a sex shop, rather than anywhere else. And I can almost guarantee that wouldn’t be so pretty.”

“You kinky bastard” I laughed, earning an almost disappointed look from the old lady next to me.

“Pretty things or sexy things. Tough call.”

“If you get sexy things I won’t like you anymore”

“Aw,” he said. I didn’t need to see him to know he was pouting. “Guess this’ll have to do, then.”

“What is this?”

“Nuh-uh, gorgeous.”


“I won’t be long, you’ll survive ten minutes, won’t you?”

“I guess. I’ve got granny to keep me company,” I said and turned to the woman next to me, “Sorry, I don’t know your name”

Maxxie giggled just as I put the phone back to my ear. “Watch it, English boy, I’ve got a credit card and I know how to use it”

“I’d be concerned if you didn’t.”

“Do you want me to go buy a plane ticket? Cause I will”

“No. I want you to stay on that bench with your granny friend, wait for me to come with pretty things and then come with me to see my mum.”

“Alrighty then. Hurry up and get your ass here”

“Will do, gorgeous.”

With that he hung up and I smiled proudly at the old lady. “My boyfriend”.

She smiled back and went back to the newspaper she’d been reading. I grinned inwardly as I waited for Maxxie and whatever it was he’d bought me.

The End

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