"I've had my rebound, I'm moving on, I'm ready to put effort into a real relationship now, and I want it to be with you”.
I stopped at that, my drink waiting halfway on its journey to my mouth. I stared straight ahead, trying to process exactly what Maxxie had just said. Which was no easy task considering the ungodly amount of liquor in my system was finally starting to take effect. I put my glass down and let my arms hang down by my side. You know those points in life when you know you’re about to make either the best or worst choice of your life? This was one of these moments. And making that choice through the fuzz of alcohol really wasn’t helpful.
“Maxxie… I don’t… I… You…”
There was only silence from Maxxie so I guessed he was waiting for me to order the words right in my head. Chances were he’d be waiting a long time. About ten minutes to be precise.
"How do I know I can trust you? How do I know you won't go back to him, even if it's just a one night stand?"
"Believe it or not, Cay, I do have a brain. I'm not stupid enough to have a one night stand with someone I'm trying to forget when I want to make our relationship work."
"...It's happened to me before"
I saw him nod understandingly out of the corner of my eye. "Alex can't even make up his mind if he's straight or bi or whatever. I promise you, any kind of contact with him is totally unwilling on my part."
"How... How do I know I can trust myself?"
He hesitantly shuffled closer to me and I felt the familiar feeling of his arm around my waist. " I trust you," he flashed me a weak smile.
I smiled back a little but it didn’t quite reach my eyes. "But Max, I don't know if I can trust myself. I almost went off with some guy just now just because I felt used"
"It's okay," he mumbled, "If I can understand why, I can usually forgive. That's not an all okay for fucking off with other guys. You're my boyfriend, 'kay? I'd like it to stay that way, please."
"I care about you. A lot. Probably a shit load more than I should. I don't want to hurt you"
He smiled at that. "I could say the same about you," he paused for a moment, "C'mon. I better get you home, hmm?"
"Maxxie?" I said, standing up but not really getting anywhere.
"Yeah?" he stood and offered me his hand.
"I never said thanks. For Gary. And I think... I think I fucking love you" I said, slurring a teensy bit and leaning on his shoulder for support.
"Y'know... I might just love you too," he kissed me, though the booze had numbed my brain and I couldn’t really feel it that well, and moved his arm back around my waist.
I smiled then winced as my head throbbed with pain "Why does my head hurt this much?"
"You drank too much,"
"I'm not even drunk. Look, I can walk fine and everything" I said a little defiantly, detaching myself from him and stumbling a little but ultimately staying upright.
"I dunno then. Sleep it off, you'll be fine."
All of a sudden my brain decided to co-operate and thought it would remind me why "Oh... I know why it hurts so bad!"
"I got punched. By the sidewalk" I giggled. And then, baby, everything went black.