I never get used to it, waking up alone in the hospital. It reminds me that no one really cares about me anymore. Sometimes I think, that if I died, the only person who would miss me is Drew, and that’s only because of the money she gets from me.
"Oh, you're up." The nurse looked at me with a bit of concern. "I'll get the doctor." She said as she waddled along towards the door, she stopped before turning the handle. "Oh, yes," she said looking back, "You're friend was very worried about you, he needed to get some air. He'll be back though." She gave me a sweet smile before toddling on outside. Friend? What friend? I didn't have any friends. All my 'friends' left me behind three years ago, they must have meant Hot-Sexy-Grumpy-Not-A-Morning-Person-Guy.
The doctor came in, reading some charts and looking over some things. He looked at me angrily. "Son, you were admitted here two years ago for the same reason, am I correct?" Somehow, I felt like he was interrogating me.
"Ya, sorry, I didn't realize the martini contained vodka." The doctor raised one eyebrow, and looked at me like I was an idiot.
"Son, do you realize the consequences of this matter?" He looked at me unnervingly. Then removed his specks and stared at me.
"You put me on meds....right?" The seemed slightly annoyed.
"Son, if you make this mistake again, it can cost you your life, do you realize that?” He stared at me expecting me to say something, I was alive wasn't I?
“Uh....Sorry.” I answered unsurely
We need to inform your family and friends, so as to make absolute sure that this mistake does not occur again, We already wrote down the number of your friend, so there is no need for that, but our parents is appreciated.
I didn't know how to answer him. I didn't feel like lying to him, but I didn't want to tell him the truth. ‘My parents disowned me cause I was gay’ ya, that would sound good.
"I don't have a family. I live alone." I answered. I twinge of pain penetrated my heart.
“I’m sorry to hear that that.” He said unsurely.
I felt so soar. No one cared. No one wanted me. I was alone. If I did die, would anyone really be sad? I meant nothing to anyone. No one even knew I was in here....except a guy who picked me up from the bar last night, and I don't even know his real fucking name. Fuck this. What the fuck do I have to live for? Hot-Guy, he didn't care enough to come back. No one did. He'd probably find some hot guy to fuck in an alley somewhere, and forget I existed. The doctor had long since left. I felt the tears trickle down my cheeks. For some reason, they wouldn't stop falling. They just continued to flow harder and faster. “I’ll tell you what,” I thought to myself, “If Hot-Guy returns, I won’t give up on this fucked up life, if he doesn’t, screw it.”
I’ve gotten used to waking up in many places, but, no, I don't think I'll ever get used to waking up alone in a hospital.