Hadley: OmeletteMature

You know how I was under the impression that I was mature enough to not burn down an apartment? I think I should take that back. Just a couple days after Maxxie left I’d been trying to cook something and all that was happening was some smoke and a slight burnt smell. I heard the door thing go and sort of dashed over, buzzing whoever was at the door inside. I didn’t really have time to look who it was, there was a nuclear disaster occurring in a saucepan. Alex walked in since I’d left the door unlocked and went straight to the fridge, complaining of hunger.

"You're welcome to have some of... this" I said, looking down at my nuclear disaster.

Alex looked at it as if to say ‘what the fuck is this shit?’ "Dear god, do you not know how to cook either?"

"I know some things..." I mumbled.

"Then cook those things" he said, smiling slightly, "any idea how long Max is gonna be away for?"

"He said a few days" I said while attempting to salvage the failure of a meal in front of me.

"That's alright then. I can try and teach you how to cook if you like and then you can take all the credit. I tried to teach Max once. Never again"

I laughed. "A decent cooked meal might be nice in the sea of take out" I smiled a little and Alex smiled back.

"He can cook pancakes, waffles, scrambled eggs and toast. And sometimes bacon" Caleb said, eating something he’d found most likely in his pocket.


I blushed a tiny bit. Thanks for that, Caleb.

"Last time he tried he burnt it" Caleb said and Alex tried not to laugh. I just blushed some more.

Alex grinned. "I have a challenge on my hands then?"

"Yep. Don't expect me to master anything more advanced than like an omelette," I turned to Caleb, "And fuck you, bro, I can make cupcakes as well"

"Want me to go fetch your pink frosting, Hayley?"

"I'm not a girl" I pouted.

"Oh I'm sure we can go one up from an omelette" Alex said, getting back to the main issue.

"Dude, don't even get your hopes up for me mastering an omelette. The furthest I can get is probably toast"

Alex didn’t look amused at that. "At least one of you must be able to do more than order a Chinese or fry something. Seriously"

I shrugged.

"And since Max is impossible to teach anything to apart from maybe sex, it'll have to be you" he said brightly, pointing me in the direction of the fridge.

I opened the fridge with a laugh, awaiting further instruction.

"Eggs, milk, cheese" he said, throwing away what I’d been attempting before.

I grabbed them out of the fridge as Alex grabbed a bowl, a fork and a frying pan. "If you can do scrambled egg, you can do omelette"


"So mix two eggs and a lil bit of milk in the bowl, put some salt and pepper in, and then fry it"

I did as he said and ultimately only burnt about an eighth of it. Which apparently wasn’t good enough for Caleb.

"Bro, you fail"

Alex cut off the burnt bits and told me to grate the cheese over it and fold it in half. Once I’d done it, he told me to serve it up once the cheese was melted.

"I guess that wasn't too difficult" I said once I’d put it on a plate.

"Not a total disaster" Alex smiled.

"I still need to work on the whole 'not burning stuff' thing"

"You still fail" Thanks, Caleb.

Alex chuckled. "That's alright. If we run out of stuff to practice not burning, we can go shopping"

"Do I get to burn something?" Caleb asked him.

"When we get back to mine"

"Why not here?"

"Because you're not the one learning how to cook here. The Bunny boy is" Alex chuckled, winking at me.

I groaned. "Not you as well"

He laughed and ruffled my hair. I just pouted a little bit.

"Sorry, I just couldn't resist. I won't call you the Bunny boy again"

"Good" I chuckled a little and he smiled.

"Right, what am I burning next?"

He thought about it for a while. "Pasta bake?"

I smiled and nodded.

"Does he even have anything you can make the sauce with...?" he started looking and pretty much the only thing he found was a long since expired tin of tomatoes.

"I think we need to go to the store" I said. Not stating the obvious there at all, dude.



We got back with a lot of healthy food, something I’d gotten used to not really eating that much. Caleb had snuck a lot of candy in there for himself, along with a colouring book and two sets of crayons. Yeah, that’s what I thought. Alex taught me how to make a pasta bake and the sauce to go with it and amazingly, I didn’t epicly fail at it.

He clapped me on the back and chuckled. "Celebratory beer with dinner?"

Caleb looked up from his colouring book. "Someone said beer"

"Beer may have been mentioned" Alex nodded.

"Do I get beer?"

"Depends if you'll behave"

Caleb looked at him innocently and Alex just looked a little bit suspicious.

Caleb looked horrified that Alex doubted his innocence. "What?"

"No punching anyone in the balls today"

"Well there go my plans for the afternoon" he giggled and Alex smiled slightly. "Guess I'll just go back to my colouring book then"

Alex shrugged. "If you really want" he smiled.

Caleb went back to his colouring book and held it up after a while, grinning. "It's a Magikarp"

Alex sat with him, putting an arm around his waist and Caleb grinned again.

"Bet you can't draw Pokémon"

Alex chuckled. "Can't draw    anything    "

"Score, finally something I'm better at than you"

Alex kissed his cheek and he smiled. I sat down on the floor and Alex looked up from what Caleb was doing.

"So what've you been up to the last couple days? Apart from starving"

"Working mainly. It's not fun being grown up"

"Which is why I'm planning not to" Caleb said cheerfully.

"How's catching up on that course you wanna do at college going?"

"I haven't really done much..."

"Thought you wanted to start this year?”

"I do. I just haven't gotten round to it yet"

Alex frowned a tiny bit. "Well good luck catching up on medicine" he said, smiling a little.

I smiled back and Caleb giggled a little. Alex looked at him curiously but he was busy with his colouring book again. Alex watched what Caleb was colouring in before pouting.

"I'm not a cow"

Caleb giggled again. "Yes you are"

"How so?"

"Because I said so"

Alex pouted some, which Caleb ignored.

"I like cows"

"I should hope so too"

Caleb giggled yet again and kissed him. Alex kissed back and Caleb kissed him again without stopping for air. I switched the TV on, not really up to perving on them making out but Alex seemed to notice this.

"Sorry, mate"

I looked over and saw him sort of smiling. "Wha?"

He shrugged slightly. "I said I was gonna get some beers in, not leave you to watch TV"

"I don't mind either way" I smiled.

"I mind. And I vote beer" Caleb said and Alex rolled his eyes.

"I'll be back in a few" he pecked Caleb on the cheek and left.

Caleb shuffled onto the floor with me and pretty much sat on my lap. “Wanna rebuild the fort?”

The End

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