I just sit there on the edge of the bed, staring at the floor. I've tried, and that's what matters... right? I did my best to get him to get his dizziness and stuff sorted out.
Eventually, a doctor finds me sat there and asks me to move, since I'm not a patient and the one who's supposed to be a patient has discharged himself. I nod dumbly and move, wandering aimlessly out of the ward. The doc kinda follows and asks if I'm okay. I look up and blink.
"Oh. Yeah, I'm fine." She doesn't look convinced, but what can you do? I sort of walk off, trying to look like I know where I'm going, but I don't. I don't especially want to leave - unlike Hads and Cay, hospitals don't have any effect on me at all.
Talking of Cay, my feet seem to be taking me in his direction.
"Wow, twice in one day. Am I a lucky boy or what?" Cay says and I glance up at him not bothering to ask if I can sit in the chair by his bed this time.
"I'm tired," I mutter, leaning my head back on the wall and closing my eyes.
"Caring about the Smiths is tiring."
"We're a troublesome bunch," he chuckles. You don't say.
"Mmm. Hadley's convinced that there's nothing wrong with him. How many people do you know that just pass out for no apparent reason?"
"Oh what, like the time when his face said hi to the wall in gym class?" I just shrug. How would I know? I wasn't there. I'm too tired to care what he's talking about right now anyways. I could quite happily go to sleep in this really rather uncomfortable plastic chair.
"Where is he now?"
"Well, he didn't stick around long enough for the docs to even consider giving him a blood test," I open my eyes, realising that he could more than likely get dizzy outside with no one around to help him, "I should go catch up with him."
"He's probably on the phone to Caleb somewhere."
"Yeah... Caleb's at my place. He won't be able to get back there without walking for ages."
"He's a Smith, natural born walker," he shrugs and I sigh.
"Yeah... a natural born walker with a habit of passing out." A teeny frown creases his brow.
"You're really worried about him, aren't you?" I just bite my lip a little and nod, staring back up at the ceiling. Apparently not worried enough to drag my ass out of the hospital and follow him, though. That said, he's probably not so please with me dragging him to hospital...
Why do I just keep making things worse? Seriously. Why can't I just crawl away and hide somewhere where I can't fuck anything up any more?
"Maybe Caleb can convince him to stick around?" Cay's voice snaps me out of my self-pitying /loathing thoughts and I lift my shoulders in a sort of shrug. He gives me this kind of sympathetic smile and I close my eyes again.
"He's probably not best pleased at me for bringing him here in the first place. I should probably leave him to cool off." Cayden just hums an "mmm" and I can't think of much else to say, other than asking if John's around again. Which would only bring up questions like ‘what kind of a run in did you actually have with him?' I can't imagine me telling him that the guy he's convinced he loves actually doesn't give a shit and only split us up in an effort to get to me.
Cay's silent for a while, and I kind of doze a little bit. I'm not asleep enough to not notice him prodding at his ribs, though. I reach across and slap his hand away from his ribs.
"It'll take longer to heal, stop it."