Obviously it wasn't long before I started sprouting floppy ears and a tail, and growing this soft fuzz called fur. It was an odd sensation, but no odder than anything else that happened to me over the course of this utterly insane tale.
The starfish kept reminding me that I was a puppy as I trudged through the Monopoly Yellows and over the black bar into the Free Parking.
A variety of vehicles were left abandoned in the concrete desert. Hovercrafts were the chief category, followed closely by unicycles, a popular form of transport in these times, I knew instinctively.
Of course my starfish and I could not leave without stealing something, so we found a minibus and I attempted to operate it. I shall take this opportunity to rant about the inadequacy of paws for such an activity. How is one meant to use controls with these great padded things like giant's feet? It's just stupid.
Eventually we managed fairly well. Ellie steered, using her starfish suckers to grip the wheel, and I pushed random buttons with my nose. Funny how I used to be able to drive cars fairly well around carparks and the like, of course when there were no police around, and had a good idea of how to drive Dad's bus, and yet as a dog of some description I was having great difficulty in reading the squiggles on the buttons I knew in my human brain to be words.
But dogs, like any other beings, have the knowledge they need to live and survive, and nothing more. And dogs don't need to be able to drive minibuses.
That was when we took a wrong turning and drove straight off the cliff.