I am in the Saharah. I think. The water has turned to sand. Hot sand. Here I am, lying in syrup, surrounded by sand. Well.
Now what to do. i slowly crawl to my feet, however I stay in my syrup bubble. What kind of crazy world is this? As I make my sticky way across the sand, I noticed a starfish. What in Zeus' name is a starfish doing here!?!
"Hello friend! My name is Ellie! Bless your face, my puppy!" it sang to me. Yes, sang.
"Er, hello. Um. Where am I and what am I doing here?"
"This is the monopoly yellows. We speak Yiddish here. Welcome puppy!"
"I AM NOT A PUPPY!"
"Yes you are."
"Can we stop fighting now?"
There was a pause.
And that was that. I picked her up, put a string round her and tied her round my waist. I am carrying a starfish by name of Ellie who thinks i'm a puppy, round my waist. Fancy that!
Oh, I forgot to mention, It's snowing in the Saharah! (Sorry, Monopoly Yellows).