Okay, I don't really know what happened there, if I'm honest. One minute I'm happy and everything's fine, next thing I know, my temper's snapped for no apparent reason and I'm telling Gemme she's being ridiculous and leaping out of the window just for some smokes.
On my walk to the shop, I calm down a bit, though obviously not much, because the shop keeper gives me this weird look and goes all edgy, like he thinks I'm gonna snap and pull out a gun and demand all the money in the cash register.
I don't, by the way. My gun's still in the bedside cabinet, just lying there doing nothing. I s'pose most people would say that's the best thing for a gun to be doing - nothing, but y'know.
The walk back doesn't take long, and my temper cools off a bit more. When I get back, I see Gemme and Benny hugging in the kitchen and, well, what can I say? It doesn't help my temper. I don't say anything to them, just slam the door and go upstairs.
I lie on the bed for a bit with a smoke and the ashtray sat on my stomach, not really knowing what to do. So I sit up, dump the ashtray on the floor, put the cigarette between my lips and catch my guitar as it flies over to me, a bit faster than I'd meant it to. I start playing it, playing through the songs that were returned to me along with Emily. It calms me down more than walking did and by the time Gemme comes in, I'm almost back to the way I was before my temper decided it had had enough of being quiet.
I look up and stop playing, taking the cigarette from my lips. Blowing out smoke, I mutter a "sorry", before laying the guitar down beside me.
"No need," she says. I put my cigarette in the ashtray and pull my knees up to my chest, hugging them there.
"Yeah there is. I didn't mean to snap at you."
"I'm used to it, don't worry about it." Yeah that makes me feel even better about it, thanks.
"You shouldn't have to be used to it," I sigh, lighting another smoke.
"Would you rather me not be used to it and it aggravate me every time?"
"That's not what I said," I mumble, waving my hand dismissively. "Whatever. You not painting today after all, then?" I ask, noticing that she's wearing her normal clothes.
"I'm not in the mood." I half nod, taking a drag on my cigarette.
"So what are you in the mood for, then?" I ask after a while.
"I- don't know. Not for someone to die. I'm sick of death today." I don't really know what to suggest.
"No one's died today... have they?" I add uncertainly.
"No, but I'm sick of seeing the images in my head, if this is part of my power I want rid of it!" I look from Gemme to the half cigarette in my hand and then dump the cigarette in the ashtray, opening my arms, offering a hug. She nods and I move to a more normal sitting position, letting her sit on my lap as I wrap my arms around her.
We sit like that in silence for a long time before Benny knocks on the door, poking his head around the frame. I look up at him.
"I'm going to the shops. Do we need anything other than bread?" he asks, apparently not getting the fact that he shouldn't have come in at all. Gemme shakes her head as best she can against my chest.
"Common sense. Is that something you can get? I think you need it." I force a smile and he rolls his eyes.
"Very funny, Cancer." He mutters, walking away again. A few moments later, the front door opens and closes and I can hear Benny walking away from the house.
"You looked very angry when Ben walked in." Gemme says after a while. Did I? I wasn't angry as such, just... annoyed at him for no good reason. That happens a lot.
"I didn't mean to." I keep doing things I don't mean to, apparently.
"Oh." She mumbles. "Oh!" She exclaims, "that painting's still outside."
"What painting?" I ask. Why would there be a painting outside?
"Umm, I'm just going to get it," she says, slipping her arms from around me, getting up. I get up too and follow her downstairs, watching from the back door as she picks up a canvas of me I've not seen before. It's me with two wings, not one, like the one she did of me before.
And beyond that is a big pile of ash where the furniture I'd been meaning to burn was. I look between the ash, the painting and Gemme, suspicion growing. Was it out here because she wanted to burn it?
"Where's the rest of your art?" I ask, not even bothering to hide the doubt in my voice.
"Even you're not that dumb, Luca." She mutters, hugging the canvas to her chest. Oh, thanks.
"Why d'you burn it?" I don't really know how to feel about it. I don't know if I should feel anything about it, but... hey, my temper really isn't something that should be getting sparked off today.
"They were...imperfect." she says. And the nagging anger that she would burn all those paintings grows.
"Imperfect?" I repeat dully, really not impressed by this ‘excuse'.
"Yes. They were." She shrugs, pushing past me and walking back into the house.
"How were they ‘imperfect'?" C'mon, most of them were of me - ya can't blame me for at least being curious.
"They had no soul," she says. No soul? It's a load of coloured goo on a piece of material, how can it have a soul?
"Right," I shake my head and light a cigarette. What else is there to say to that? I can feel my temper about to snap again, so it's probably a good idea to shut up right about now anyways.