I feel so weak - like I'm the one that's breaking here, not Gemme. I cling to her the way I cling to a high for as long as possible. The tears threaten to escape once again, and I wonder briefly what it is about Gemme that makes me go all emotional and stupid. I sniff and pull away, leaning back against the pink wall.
"Sorry. I'm being pathetic again." I mutter quietly as I look back at her, not at all confident that my eyes haven't gone puffy or that I look like crap.
"No you're not." Typical Gemme. Of course she would say that.
"How can you say that? What about this isn't pathetic?" Because let's face it, this isn't exactly dignified, is it? I don't mind her bursting into tears on me so much, but c'mon. I'm a guy. The most violent, scary, addicted guy in school, to name a few attributes associated with me. Crying my eyes out on some girl's shoulder, or near enough, isn't one of them.
"All of it! Showing emotion is not pathetic Luca; it makes me see that you're not so cold." Uh huh. Emotions never did anyone any good, though did they? They always seem to be the cause of something bad, and never the solution.
"I like being cold. It's a hell of a lot easier than this." This, being sober and feeling more than the emptiness of my ‘happy' place or a needle in my arm.
"Life isn't meant to be easy." She replies, her voice soft and kinda soothing, but...
"But why does it have to be so hard?"
"It's only hard because for you it's such a big change. I'm not asking you to change for the whole world. Just me." What you thought I was gonna let down my guard around anyone else?
"But I've always been cold..." I mumble, my thoughts instantly turning back to when I killed my mom and every other murder since.
"But you don't have to be, you're not like that to me." She points out, but I shake my head. I do have to be. And I'm not cold too her anymore because... I couldn't do it. She's just...
"You're... different." I say, when I find the word. It's not the best word, but I guess it'll do.
"How so?" Good question.
"Well you don't automatically call me a freak or anything because of my powers. You're... probably the first person I've met that's worth knowing."
"Thank you, but to do otherwise is just stupid, selfish and mean." She pauses and smiles and the next words out of her mouth are totally not what I was expecting - not that I was really expecting anything in particular, mind - and completely random: "What is this "pet trouble" you were on about earlier?"