I move to the table, sitting there I cried my eyes out. I looked at the wood, to somehow sort it all out. It didn’t work. But, what did happen scared the living daylights out of me.
“You can’t do that! You can’t let him walk out on us again!” I cried at... well, myself.
“What? Who are you?”
“I’m Gemme. The real Gemme, unfortunately, there’s not much room in here. So stop whining and remember so I can come back.” She growled, well I growled... you get the picture. I shook my head and got up, I hand-baked a pizza and then made myself a cup of tea after it had finished cooking. But, after I finished eating the voice came back.
“Gemme, umm, yeah, please. Concentrate on me rather hard... please.”
“What, why? What’s it gonna do?” I growled at myself, then, I slapped myself.
“Stop being a wimp and do it!”
"I never found talking to myself made anything less confusing," Luca muttered and I jumped. I didn’t even hear him come downstairs.
"It’s not like I chose to," I murmured, I really didn’t. “Hey, please...concentrate.”
"I dunno, it was sort of me... but not me,"
"Your other personality? You called her Nigh, before." Gemme and Nigh. That’s clever, “That’s you. I’m Gemme, you’re Nigh.”
"Hmm, she really misses you."
"Why? I'm still here, aren't I?"
"Well, that's not what I mean, I mean. She misses being with you." “Concentrate.” Okay, okay.
"Oh,” he nodded.
"My names not Nigh, Muse. My name's Gemme and this is tearing me apart!"
His eyes widened slightly, "Gemme?"
"Well, I guess I did give myself to you. So yes, that would make me yours."
"But how...? I thought...?"
"What, that when I lose my power Nigh takes over and becomes an utter bitch? Oh I know. But luckily, she took most of the impact." I grinned and then rubbed my cheek, "I shouldn't have slapped myself so hard."
"...I am so confused."
"I'd explain but it may take a while and as I remember you don't do talking."
"I can listen though."
"Good, come... sit." He did just that and I took a deep breath, beginning my explanation.
"You see, my mind is split in two, her and me. When they injected me they attacked my mind, which was at the time, harbouring Nigh, not me. So she lost everything. I however lost all my memories, but not my personality. I was dormant for a while, trying to let myself recover, but when you were about to walk out... I pushed myself a little too hard." I smiled weakly, my brain hurting.
"Sorry," he murmured, "I didn't realise." No, you’re not that smart. I know.
"I didn't think you would. I should've done something sooner. But whatever they did attacked my power and seeing as I knew more about how to use my power than Nigh, Nigh got pulled forward." I’m not surprised he’s confused. But I thought he might be a little more ecstatic to see me again.
However, I can’t help but feel sorry for Alice. I still couldn’t remember her, but she’s only five. She shouldn’t have to go through this. Oh, I wanted to tell her sorry. I couldn’t help but feel curious about Benny either.
"I thought I'd completely lost you," he muttered almost uncertainly, as if he didn't quite believe what was happening.
"You almost did." I whispered, standing up from the table. "Well, now's as good a time as any." I murmured, walking over to the cupboard under the sink. He watched me quietly as I bent down, opening the cupboard I pulled out a book, I walked back over to the table and gave it to him.
In it were sketches of him, the whole hundred page book full of sketches and paintings of Luca, on both sides of each piece.“That’s how much I missed you when you left. That’s why I went back to landscapes. Seeing you about to leave again reminded me where I put it.”
He looked through the pictures silently, glancing up at me a couple of times before closing it and getting up to wrap his arms around me. "I'm afraid I’m still a little hazy on the cute little one, the band and Benny. But I'm back. Dunno how long it'll last though. I'm still feeling weak." I raised my arms, hugging him back.
“Just hope you find a different way of pushing through that doesn't involve me threatening to go," he mumbled.
"Don't threaten to leave then, silly. Just remember I'm still there and Nigh is an idiot. ‘Kay?"
"Come on, enjoy it while it lasts." I whispered into his ear, kissing his neck slightly.
"You make it sound like it's not gonna last very long."
"To be honest, I don't know," I feel like I could just disappear in just a moment.
"Fucking hell, I missed you," he said, kissing me.
I kissed him back fiercely, savouring it. "I love you, Luca. And remember, you promised you’d never let me go!"
"I love you too. I'm sorry; I'm an idiot."
"I know. You're forgiven." I smiled, resting my head on his shoulder. "You're a really big, hot, sexy, protective idiot! But you're mine, so it's okay." I laughed. He laughed too, running a hand through my hair and I really wished I didn’t have to go.