I don’t know and trying to remember is just making me tired. I look to him. “His gorgeous Phoenix,” I think on the word. The word, “Phoenix,” I concentrate hard. Really hard, so much my hand is on my forehead, my brain aching. Bloody headaches, I curse beneath my breath and look to Luca. “Phoenix, to rise from the ashes, Ashes, your son, your song, guitar, Martin...” The long string of words didn’t mean a lot to me, but somehow it was like I had a jigsaw and the pieces fitted together to create a small part of the big picture. I just had no idea where the smaller bit fitted into the rest of it.
It seemed like concentrating hard didn’t work either. I just came out with what seemed, to me, to be nonsense. "You bought me the Martin, a while ago now. I use it on the acoustic songs," he muttered, attempting to fill in some of the gaps for me, "the ashes, I told you that you were sitting in the ashes of the past, you were the phoenix and everything up until a few weeks ago was the ash."
"Why was it ash? What burnt away?" To be honest, half of what he said didn’t actually stick.
"Umm... Us," he bit his lip slightly, "we fell out a couple of months ago, I guess not long before Alice was left with you. I was talking about us as ash at the time. But I guess we rose out of the ashes, like the phoenix. We got back together. The last few weeks have been brilliant."
"Cherry Blossoms," I didn’t get what he just said either; the only thing that came into my head was cherry blossoms. I was hoping he would know why.
"In Japan. We fell out in Japan and you ran away from me to the cherry trees."
"Oh. They were pretty. You're very pretty." I tried to search further, what did it all mean?
I nodded; a tired smile on my face. "Like an angel." So that’s where he got his wings from. I didn’t really think before I spoke, I was too tired now. I just let myself speak.
"I'm no angel, gorgeous," he sighed and stopped at the tired look on my face. "If you're tired, d'you wants me to carry you?"
My eyes flickered closed for a moment before I snapped them back open. "I wouldn't want to... be a pain."
"You wouldn't be at all. I'll give you a piggy back."
"I wouldn't want to immobilise your wings."
"I will." I yawned, my eyes flickering again. "Angel..." I whispered, mainly to myself.
"C'mon, gorgeous," he said, turning slightly and crouching so I could climb on his back.
"I'm not gorgeous." I protested, weakly crawling onto his back, my arms around his neck.
He put his arms under my legs, holding me up as he straightened again, "you are. You really are."
"I'm not." I shook my head, resting it on his shoulder.
He turned his head to kiss me gently, "go to sleep," he murmured, despite the softness in his lips I pulled away. “What did you just do?” I asked, shocked. He just kissed me.
"S-sorry," he stuttered.
"Y... you can put me down now." I murmured.
"Just go to sleep," he muttered, not quite able to hide the hurt in his voice. You don’t understand, I’m not your Gemme...
I shook my head. "Put me down." He crouched and obliged, letting me off. "Thank you." I growled, straightening myself up I walked a little faster than him and he walked a little slower. But I didn’t want to walk with Rayn and, that would have just been more difficult.
But, I couldn’t fool the tiredness that had taken such a tight grip on me. I dropped my bag and once again. I found myself bloody falling.