Eugh, I prefer teaching Alice to Luca, she seems more enthusiastic. Like she actually wants to learn, I make him read through the first few pages, teaching him the different sounds and at times certain tricks of how to remember things. He was getting better. I could feel it as his fluency increased along with his speed. But I could feel his frustration with himself and after a while I sigh, closing the book. “That’s it for today; if we spend any longer you’ll get bored of it.” I stated and then looked to his hoodie. “On another note, you may want to put Damien’s diary back. He’s coming back himself.”
“Yeah,” he muttered as he walked back to his hoodie. I got up, greeting Damien at the door as Luca disappeared upstairs.
“Hey,” I smiled, “let me take some of those bags off you.” I reached forward, taking some of the bags from his hands and walking back to the L-shaped couch.
"Thanks," he smiled, looking up as Luca came back down.
"Umm, do you mind if we talk, though?"
"Your writing," I smiled, I wanted to know and I needed to know now.
"What about it?" he asked, arching an eyebrow slightly.
"I want to know what you've been writing and what your fascination of Luca is."
Luca walked past us, taking Alice outside where they began to play in the park and I sat down at the table, looking up at him as he spoke, “why?”
Thank you, Luca, "Why not?"
"Journals are supposed to be private, aren't they?"
"When you are keeping it such a secret, people are bound to know and when it's about Luca. I have a right to know."
"Well if you have a right to know about what I think of Cancer and then technically, so does he, but I don't hear him asking, do you?"
“Luca doesn’t do...talking,” he’s more of the sort of person to steal your journal and find out that he can’t actually read it.
"No and neither do I. It works that way." What does he mean, it works? What works?
"But I do, and I want to know," my voice rose, just a little as I spoke, almost demanding to know.
He sat heavily at the table and put his chin on his hand, scowling up at me. "Fine. I write about Cancer, because he's interesting. I mean, I've known Phil since I was like, ten, so I don't really need to write about him... Rayn isn't too hard to figure out, he likes coke and heroin more than he likes sex and he's good at the guitar. And he's like a hyper five year old. But Cancer... he's so... I dunno, complex. He won't tell any of us about his past, and Rayn has been sworn to secrecy or something. And it's not just his past, like the way he acts sober and high, sometimes it's hard to tell, but others it's really obvious..." he trailed off, frowning.
"Right, well, I'd be careful what you write. Did no one ever tell you I'm psychic?"
"No, you failed to mention that one,” he paused, as if something was ticking through his head. "Wait, if your psychic, why ask?"
"Don't like using my powers, it's rude." I smiled, "but you're right, the world id black and white till you look at Luca."
"Huh, I thought he was confusing before, but when you're around, it's like he's a completely different person altogether."
"What can I say; I have influences on people like that," I shrugged.
"Mmm..." he looked out of the window at him playing with Alice. "He's better with kids than I thought he would be though... Might explain why he's friends with Rayn though."
"Yeah," I nodded but then curiosity made a question pop into my head, "hey... have you written about me in that journal of yours?"
"Not much... only about how you're a good influence on the guy."
"Hmm, I wouldn't quite say that," yes, but he doesn’t know about that and I doubt he ever will. Because I will never tell him and I doubt Luca will either.
"Well, you seem like it. He's nicer to be around now you're here."
I waved a hand dismissively, "another life... another life."
I grinned. "You must realise, you will never know about Luca, or me. Don't get too annoyed about it, will you?"
"No... I kinda figured after a month of trying to get anything out of him about his past I'll never know. I know he hates my fascination with him, but the less he tells me, the more I wanna know," he laughed dryly.
"Of course, it’s human instinct." I smiled. "But, don't you have a girlfriend or something to fuss about?"
He rolled his eyes, "no, why would anyone be interested in the drummer boy when they have 'hottest celebrity' Cancer to gawk at and want?" Of course, but with so many people flinging themselves at Luca, I think it may be harder to keep him.
"You're very cute Damien!" I smiled, taking his hand comfortingly, "you have a wonderful skill and you’re very caring and devoted too." I nodded and sighed. "Don't talk about yourself as if you're nothing."
"Cute?" he laughed, "none of us are the slightest bit sexy, according to you last night."
"Of course, Luca's very protective and I've hurt him before." I sighed, "Don't write this and between you and me, I would never, ever sleep with Rayn. After Luca, it would be you, then Phil," I half-smiled.
"Thanks," he half smiled back at me. "I know he's protective. Well, I do now you're around. The way he treated girls before you came along was... about as unprotective as you can get, really."
I laughed, Emily flickering to my mind as I shook my head. "You have no idea."
"I think I have some idea, thanks," he muttered, staring back out of the tinted window, "I've cleared up after him more times in the last couple of months than I care to remember. Kat hung in there the longest, bless her, but the amount of times she'd knock on my hotel door in tears after he kicked her out at three in the morning or whenever is just..." he sighed and looked back at me, "but he's not like that with you. I don't get it."
"And I can't tell you. But hear this, Luca doesn't do well with his past and the reason he was so heartless with his girlfriends when you were there is because..." I paused. Damn, this is hard, I swallowed and continued. "Because I walked away with his heart a while ago, he finally trusted someone, he finally felt again and I shot him down." I folded my arms and rested my head on them.”
"So he didn't just know you, he was with you before... I guess that makes more sense."
"Crap." I sobbed, "I shouldn't have told you anything."
"It's okay. I won't write about it in my journal," he mumbled, shuffling around to awkwardly put an arm around me.
I batted him away. Looking up and wiping my eyes I swallowed my tears. "Another lifetime," I whispered. "I'm fine, I'm fine."
Withdrawing, he moved back a little and sighed, "Well, if it's any consolation, he seems to have gotten over it alright. He's pretty happy now, isn't he?"
"Doesn't make it all go away though." I sighed. "Heh, don't worry about it." I smiled, "you probably have things to do. You should go do them."
He shrugged, "I was only gonna upload that picture of Phil from last night," he laughed.
"Yeah, I need to get those trousers washed after where they've been." I shivered.
"He's not that bad," he laughed, standing up.
"I wore his boxers on my head, which had been near his... private area. Then, he gave me back my trousers after using them to cover up his... yeah! It's disgusting. I only go near one... I'm gonna shut up now." I laughed. Shaking his head, he smiled and disappeared upstairs to get his laptop. “You really shouldn’t, it’s rather nasty.”
"He'll live. Besides that, it makes us look like we have a life off the stage, that doesn't always involve drugs and sex."
"Heh, we should do it again. Although, I think Rayn has something for me."
"Either that or he has no fear of Rayn. Perhaps I should get that Eagle on him again." I smiled. "Just, he was the one that wanted me to strip and everything."
"Rayn pushes it because he can. He's been Cancer's best mate since they were little kids. He knows the limits."
"Yeah,” I thought for a moment, there was something I wanted to say... “Oh! When I said you could strip anyone in the circle, it wasn't that I wanted you to strip me. I just forgot I was included in that."
"Well who else was I gonna strip? I don't wanna see the others in their boxers," he smiled.
"But you want to see me in my underwear?" I smiled seductively, "I'll keep that in mind." I laughed.
"Gonna torture me like you torture Cancer?" Oh! Now I’m doing it without knowing it.
"Nah, why, did you think I was...?” I laughed, "but seriously would you... ya know."
"Maybe if you weren't with Cancer," he shrugged, turning his attention more to the screen of his laptop.
I laughed, "I will concentrate on keeping covered and not teasing you then."
He glanced at me for a second smiling, "thanks."
I couldn't help but let another giggle go as I leant forward, kissing his cheek. "Thank you."
"Don't let Cancer see," he laughed, looking out of the window again, watching Luca perform magic tricks for Alice before blinking and turning back to the laptop
"He won't mind, it's only your cheek..." Bloody magic tricks, I remember Ben. I wanted sex; he got out a piece of paper and did a magic trick. Eugh, I still want to shove that piece of paper where the sun doesn’t shine...
"If you say so," he shrugged.