He just slapped me and it hurt... I didn’t deserve it, I know I didn’t. It was still red I was sure of it. He said he didn’t want our relationship to turn out like the rest of them. Of course, but I knew it was because of the drugs. I just hoped he snapped out of it because we all know how I feel about being abused. Just look at my father’s cold body tossing in his grave.
I don’t know why I was now sat here with my arms wrapped around him, trying to comfort him as he came down. I don’t think he knew either, I just hope he didn’t ask. I should’ve just slept with him, at least then we wouldn’t be here in this situation and I’ll be able to cope with sleeping with him when he was vulnerable, well, I might have been able to cope. But we won’t know now.
I pulled away from him, bringing one of my knees up to his chest and resting on it as everyone else began to come down too. Rayn however was still giggling, and Luca said I was dropped on my head as a kid. My cheek still hurt, so I tilted my head so I could rest my burning cheek on my knee so no one could see it, but they were all too busy looking for more drugs anyway. "Luca, you okay?" He moaned and looked up, his face ashen, a light sheen of sweat clinging to his skin and his eyes were heavy.
"I'm fine," he muttered.
"You look terrible."
"I'm fine," he repeated.
"If you're going to continue lying to me, I'm going to book a motel room."
"Well what do you want me to say? That I feel as shit as i look?"
"Be honest at least. Can't you just heal it away?"
"I haven't healed away a come down for the last three months," he muttered, "at least I'm feeling something."
I sighed, shaking my head slightly, "You mean, you didn't before? So when you said I Love... you know what? I think it'll be best if I just go." I got up and began walking away at a laboured pace.
"When I said 'I love you' what?"
"It doesn't matter; I'll see you in the morning." I waved a hand dismissively. In his silence I turned and he just looked at me, silently questioning me with his tired eyes.
"You said, at least I feel. So, when you said you loved me, those times before, you didn't feel anything."
He put his head in his hands and let out a quiet groan, "no, that's not what I meant."
"Luca." I sighed, sitting next to him again as Rayn found another bag of white powder.
"I don't see why you just won't heal it away."
"Okay, so is forcing yourself on people when you're high then, I'm guessing.
With a sigh, he gave in and healed the come down, wiping away the sweat as his face returned to normal. "When we fell out, I stopped feeling again after like a week, i just pushed it all out of my head and the only thing that made me feel anything anymore was the drugs, which is why my cravings are just... insane, at the moment. Of course I felt it when I told you I loved you before."
"I'm sorry, Luca." I paused for a moment before opening my arms, offering a hug. He fell into my arms and I smiled.
"That was really embarrassing you know," I whispered into his shoulder.
"Getting stripped in front of your...friends," I explained.
"Oh... sorry," he muttered back.
"You know, I don't think I would've minded if you weren't high." He fell silent and I glanced to the others who were off their heads again, "you want to get a motel room and get outta here?"
He looked around at them too. "... Yeah. I'll get Alice."
"No need, she's well protected." I tapped my head, "just because I didn't like using my powers doesn't mean I haven't been practicing."
"Oh... okay,” I took his hand and pulled him down the bus aisle.
"She'll be fine. Plus, you need your rest by the looks of you."
He shrugged. "I've had worse."
"I know, I was there," I murmured as we finally stepped into fresh air.
"The one at Izzy's? Had worse than that, too."
"What about the one in the wardrobe?"
"Maybe if you combine the two, and add in a few causalities, yeah."
"I don't think I want to know." I smiled weakly.
“Fair enough," he shrugged again, taking my hand.
I signed us into the motel and kissed his cheek softly, the woman behind the counter almost fainted I think, huh, he is famous. "You know, next time you want me, just ask." I sighed, pulling him down the corridors.
"I'll try and keep that in mind when I'm off my face."
"You've never been like that before though," I took the key out of my pocket, with its key ring that was twice as big as the key itself and unlocked the door.
"You say that, but you haven't been around for the last couple of months. I've been worse, trust me," he muttered.
"Yeah, you're right." He walked over to the bed and flopped down onto it with a sigh. "I know it's not quite as good as my rooms but, it'll do. It has a... rustic charm." I laughed. Smiling tiredly, he put his arms up for a hug. I obliged, leaning closer to him, my arms around his neck.
"Sorry I was a dick," he mumbled, linking his hands behind me.
"Its fine, Luca, don't worry about it," I whispered back.
"Yeah... okay," he muttered uncertainly.
Its fine, honestly, you remember my father? I've had worse." I laughed half-heartedly. "Come on, you need to sleep."
"Yeah I know," he said, letting go of me, "it just feels weird when I treat you like that. I mean, I don't feel bad at all when I do it to any other girl, just you..." he sat up and stripped down to his boxers, climbing under the covers.
"Well, I guess that's a good thing." I shrugged, doing the same as I slipped of my trousers off for the second time and pulled off my top before slipping in next to him.
"Doesn't seem to actually stop me though," he sighed again, putting an arm around me.
"I blame the drugs and I forgive you." I smiled weakly, resting my head on his chest. I kissed his chest softly and whispered an “I love you,” turning my head so I could look at him as I said it.
Smiling, he kissed my lips gently, "I love you too."