I sat down in a corner in my advisory classroom, trying
my best to avoid anyone’s attention. The longer I remained invisible to the
public eye, the more I could prosper in my grades without feeling any degree of
agony. It was a tactic that had been successful for years now.
Being the first week of school, a lot of classes had been
messed up, and today, Thursday, marked the day for clearing up any mishaps.
Since I had an intelligence level higher than the majority of the people who
got lost in the crossfire, I sat comfortably knowing I had no problems that
At least that’s what I thought when she walked in. Blonde
hair and blue-gray-ish eyes marked the individual that was Samantha Joy. I
threw-up inside my mouth, the foul taste of my breakfast reaching my tongue.
She showed my advisory teacher a note. He nodded in
response and gestured to the classroom as a whole, opening it up to her. She
smiled and turned to sit down. Unfortunately, that’s when she noticed me in
my usual position in the back of the room. I cursed my bad luck silently.
Slowly but surely, she made her way to my seat. Her
awkward stroll just made me wish even more that she would just turn around and
never come back again. I had enough mental problems to cope with once the day
kicked off. Why did I have to get faced with another one?
As soon as she sat next to me, Daniel entered the room,
causing me to say another curse word, though it was much more audible this
time. I almost avoided his eye, but he soon located me and quickly took a seat
nearby. I was stuck in an awkward triangle of people I didn’t feel like
surrounding myself with at the moment. The only thing that could happen now is-
Claudia came over and filled in the seat next to Daniel.
I almost shouted at the top of my lungs, but just as my
mouth opened up I quickly locked it shut; I didn’t feel like getting a detention for
being the kid that spat out a chorus of cuss words. The triangle had now become
a square, and just to make the situation even more uncomfortable, nobody spoke
at all for at least two minutes.
“Sooo… how you guys doing?” Claudia asked, though it was
to no one in particular.
“Fine” I replied, along with Samantha and Daniel. We made
a very good impression of a perfectly synchronized choir. Claudia was the first
to show on her facial expression that she acknowledged just how completely
stupid we looked and sounded currently.
“What do you guys want to do?” Samantha asked. I held myself
back from yelling at her. However, I couldn’t resist saying something.
“I don’t know” I began sarcastically, “Maybe we can
discuss about those three long, very long years that we haven’t seen each
Thankfully, Claudia and Daniel realized that this was about
to get personal and vacated the scene for my sake. They always had my back…
which reminded me of something else I had to do later today.
I cut Samantha off. “Don’t even start with me”.
She persisted. “I wanted to apologize, okay! I know I
“Bigger mistakes than you think” I retorted.
"Yes… and I… I’m truly sorry… and you know… new year and all. I was thinking… we could”
“What?” I asked her, my patience with her wearing thin.
“… Start over?”
I mouth has already open as she said this, preparing to
make a witty, demeaning comment, but what she actually spoke of stunned me.
I think I might have started sweating. I did, no doubt,
loved her when she was by my side… no, I told myself. She was too late. Three
years too late. The other, small, romantic side of me shot back that she was
being sincere and did want me to come back.
My head became hot and a stinging feeling grew inside of
it. I became sick to my stomach, my thoughts and emotions racing side-by side,
running into each other and causing massive collisions. My brain shouted at me
to just save this for tomorrow and sleep on it, collect my thoughts.
I cursed in my head, another painful sensation coming
along with it. Can’t I just say something, yes or no? Have I sunk so low as to
not even reply to what she said with at least one, simple word. Say something.
Say something. Say something!
“Yes” I said curtly. I leaped out of my chair in a rush
and walked out the door, quickly telling my teacher some sort of excuse. As
soon as I had made it all the way down the hallway, I slammed my fists on the wall.
What had I said, what had I done? I still couldn’t fully
comprehend what had just happened. Did I just agree to get back with Samantha?
What did I tell her? I remember I had told her quite plainly and quite clearly
yes. That one simple word meant so much to her, and yet so little to me.
I heard a voice behind me. “Lionel… what’s up?” It
belonged to Daniel.
I spun around to face him, his eyes showing true concern
for me. “I haven’t seen you act like that before… you okay?”
I took a few deep breaths. Tonight, I promised myself, I
would sort everything out in my mind. For now, I’ll act as my usual self.
“Overreacted I suppose” I replied, putting enough emphasis
on my words to make him know that I didn’t want to touch that subject.
He shrugged and put his hands in his pockets. “Ok… I’ll
Daniel brought up a very critical question. “Claudia… why
did she act like she never met me before? You know, for me being the first
person to k-“he stopped abruptly.
I leaned forward, implying for him to say more. “First
He shook his headd. “Never mind. But why didn’t she
recognize me… at all? It wasn’t a joke or anything”.
“She’ll come around” I assured him. “I guess she’s having
a hard time remembering. You know you haven’t seen or talked with her in years
right? Consider that”.
He nodded as though I had successfully enlightened him. “I
guess I jumped to conclusions too quickly… well thanks”.
He began to walk back to the classroom, but I stayed
rooted to my spot. “If she still doesn’t know by the end of the week, you can
count on my backing you up” I called after him.
Daniel turned and smiled, giving me a thumbs-up sign. I
acknowledged it, and he returned to the classroom.
After a few more deep breaths, I rejoined him as well.
Samantha still sat where she was, seemingly shocked. She looked at me with
something I hadn’t seen in anyone’s eyes for a long period of time… true
happiness, joy, and thankfulness, all at the same time. Claudia sat in a separate
area in the room, looking just as surprised and her look half-demanding for an
I didn’t think much about her now. She only cared for
Daniel, right? No matter what I did, they always seemed to get along the most.
When her memory returns, she’ll flock to him. No use trying to win her over.
Samantha smiled, and I could tell it wasn’t fake in any
way, shape, or form. She was truly happy to be with me again. She wasn’t lying.
Would I belong again?