Once upon a time, there was a Warlock who worked for the government. His name was William. William had a good paying job. But assassins were on his butt every once a week. Sad really. You will always find him at Area 51, staring at a bowl of Petunias. When he was thinking, he would talk to it.
"No no. To drafty." he said, pacing across the room. His face was round, but not chubby. His body was fit, but his brain is too fit. Since he is a warlock, he could understand somethings. They found this bowl in England, it has strange powers.
"Really? You really think so? Yes I like my hair cut too," He was some-what vain of his hair.
La dah dah! A few years pass and they find out that the bowl had been nothing but a normal bowl and William was put in a place where crazy people go to. Sooner or later he got let out and spread true rumors about the governtment and died in 1959.
He wasn't happy about that, was he?
Bowl of Petunias