I hated yelling at Hallen. I really did. It was my least favorite part of being a mother. But it was necessary. She had to realize the danger she was putting us all in. Couldn't she put aside her selfish needs and see...?
All of a sudden, I was reminded of another conversation, long ago. Yet so similar.
"Illiana! What could you possibly be thinking? Do you know? Do you even care? A Dioner!" the words spilled out of Mother's mouth with unmistakable disgust.
"Mother," I protested. "Why do you hate him? It's not like he's a Gatherite..."
"Don't you say that! Don't you ever suggest that! If you are heard of having anymore relations with that Dioner..." her anger was so great she couldn't think of a way to phrase the threat.
It was like looking into a mirror of the past; slightly distorted. As much as Hallen would deny it, we were similar in so many ways. We shared the same fiery hair, the same flame in our personalities. Even, and unfortunately, the same rebellious streak.
I craved my daughter's respect. But more importantly, I craved her friendship. I hoped she would see that. I wasn't trying to be the bad guy. I just wanted her safe.
But if she followed in my steps, and the reflections stayed true, there wasn't much I could do.