15 Rules to Being (This) Amanda

1. Own at least 50 pairs of inexpensive, yet funky or cute or pretty or unusual, dangly earrings--never wear them with the backs in.

2. Embrace the inherent contradiction in being able to walk in 4 inch heels, and occasionally falling over when you're standing still.

3. Pray the Serenity Prayer regularly.  It's not just for recovering alcoholics, and it will help you with #4.

4. Try not to worry all the time.  You know first-hand that's how ulcers are made.

5. Call home at least twice a week.  Talk to your Mama, your 'full' sibling, and as many of the rest of your folks as you can.

6. Don't shout at the babies--even when they're not babies anymore, and they *still* pull your earrings out, scream wordlessly, chew random objects, and communicate as effectively as children half their respective ages.

7. Try, *constantly*, to remember that you're a grown-up now.  Aside from the times you're trying to remember to cut loose and chill out.

8. Write more about Autistic Spectrum Disorders than you ever expected to write.

9. Hang out with lots of people several years younger than you, as you write about ASDs.

10. Laugh. A lot.  At things no one else seems to find funny.

11. Develop a serious case of hypochondria that comes and goes depending on how you're feeling (and wonder if that was a bad pun...)

12. Nurture your tendency to love people a little too quickly, because you're an all-or-nothing kind of girl, and you prefer loving people to the alternative.

13. Never take the trash out. Remember to thank your better half for taking care of that, and the hundred other chores/activities/complications that he sorts out for you, on any given week.  Keep your hair as long as possible, and your toenails painted, as a sort of permanent reward.

14. Learn all the words to as many Lady Gaga songs as you can, because your daughter... and, okay, your son... really like the repetitive lyrics and crazy dance moves.

15. Wake up one day in your mid-twenties, and (undeservedly!) feel mature when you realise you're not the centre of your universe anymore.  Be a lot happier, once you've had a close look at your life.

The End

23 comments about this exercise Feed