I was caught off guard at his words, and for the first time I was at a loss for words. He had heart disease? My heart sank at these words but... I didn't respond to him, I just stood there, dumbfounded. He waited for my response but it didn't come for a while.
" I'm sorry to hear that," I said, scolding myself inwardly for saying something so stupid, " I really am.". Dad seemed bewildered for a moment with my response that it actually had sincerity in it, then again so was I. There was a silence, not an awkward one, just a silence that no one could really explain. Then I had an idea, not really a brilliant one but it would at least get me out of this silence.
" Dad let's go upstairs to my room and talk," I said, "Please...". He nodded softly, suprise showing deeply in his eyes as I moved my crutched up the stairs, carefully making my way to my room, when I stepped in there I saw Cole seated on my bed sleepily.
"Hey, Cole," I said quietly and he arose and looked over at me dully, "Dad and I kinda need to have a private conversation, would you mind...?" He recognized what was happening immediatley an he stood up brushing himself off.
"Yeah, no problem," He said moving swiftly toward the door, " I'll just go keep Nadia company." We waited until he was down the stairs and then closed the door with a soft thud. I sat down on my bed wearily and looked over at my father and took a deep breath.
"I don't completely hate you," I said softly, "You've just hurt me more than I could bear, so I shut you out." I looked him in the eye with a slight tear trickling down my face but I swallowed my sadness back up.
"But that's just because I didn't want to be hurt anymore," I said, "Because everyone in my life always seems to use me in some way or another for what they want." I waited for his reply now, just like he always did for me during these serious moments.
"I never meant to cause you this much pain," He said looking saddened by my words, "I'm sorry for everything I ever did to you..." I looked over at him with closed eyes and a slight temper.
" But there are things that need to come out of the dark now," I said coldly, " For us to heal we need to identify the scars."