I didn't know what to have expected when I returned back home. A change? Definitely not, that would have lead to disappointment. But I guess I'd been relying a little on Nadia to change things for me with Dakota. But I'd been wrong.
I slipped into that apartment, keeping my arrival as quiet as possible so as not to disturb the kids' sleep. But I could hear voices from Dakota's room, probably him and his friends who were staying over. When I passed by, I peeked in through the crack of the door. Dakota saw me, his eyes directly meeting mine but he immediately looked away, ignoring my presence.
Not even a hi.
I didn't feel remorse like usual when I retired to my room. This time I felt blank. Empty. I knew Dakota had his reasons for hating me and as far as I was concerned, I wanted to make them go away. But no matter what I tried, I felt like things wouldn't change. So what's the use even caring?
But that's exactly the part where I was stuck. I had no reason to care. I could just be another one of those father's who didn't give a damn about their children. But that was impossible. I loved the both of them; Nadia and Dakota. But I couldn't seem to patch things up.
The next morning I woke up to an empty house. Looking around, I realized that I was alone. No Nadia, no Dakota. Just me. Just another day of my life. Typical.
I didn't feel like having breakfast and instead took a few pills from my anti-depressents. Doc had warned me not to, especially not more than one. But I felt like I needed the whole bottle. I took an extra, just to get rid of this numb pain that always found its way inside.
That was when my vision started to blur. My head spun and I could no longer feel any of the pain as the drugs took its effects. In one hazy second, darkness took over. The last physical thing I felt was my head making hard contact against the floor.