The jar syndromeMature

So many people assume that boys don't have emotions. Look up at the sky you people and read the word "NAIVE" that I painted up there.

People presume this is fact because boys are taught that showing emotion is a sign of weakness that should be contained forever or for when in the privacy of their own rooms/houses. Having a jar of emotion locked away in your mind is, in my opinion, the worst and most common mental/emotional problem among boys and men. A friend of mine is suffering from what I'll now refer to as jar syndrome. I interpreted what he told about it in a nutshell that he can't help adding to it because I has a habit of not letting his emotions out. Therefore, all that hate, anger, distress, love and passion (innocent, honest) boils beneath his metaphorical skin like a magma chamber that could spew lava onto everyone around him at any time. <-- Just to note, these are not quotes. It is my analysis of what I've been told.

I have no idea of how to help this kind of problem as I haven't experienced it (being a girl, as much as I hate to admit it). However, what seems to keep him from exploding is sudden spurts of anger or hate or physical violence that has to be taken out on something. I never asked him if he has a punch bag but I wish I had enough money to buy him one. They're very effective. 

As a girl (again, as I hate to admit), I know that the way women deal with jar syndrome is to talk, cry, talk some more and finish it off with an emotional hug and preferably some food. However, this usually involves another party. The one or many person(s) involved then takes some of the strain of their problems but, as they say, a problem shared is a problem halved. 

However, I don't believe I've met many boys who's problems had been halved by talking to their friends or family. In fact, most guys would stay as far away from telling others about their problems as much as possible by hiding it underneath "manliness" or being rude or putting the "Mask" on. I hate the mask. I don't think I know many people who require, as a personal rule, some facial expression to know that the person in question is "ok" or "feeling shit". When boys put up the Mask, I can't tell if they're tired, pissed off, neutral, boiling with rage or if I've done something to upset them. They could be feeling anything and, as I don't know what they're feeling, I don't know what to say/not to say to keep their mood away from "pissed off". Sometimes, I can guess the mood right but most of the time, I have no clue and I can end up making the guy mad. So guys:

If you insist on the Mask, please put a post-it note on your forehead saying either "happy", "ok" or "unhappy" so I don't end up asking "are you ok?" all the time (which usually pisses you guys off, so what's the point?)

Well, this jar syndrome is a type of emotional problem and the only way to get rid of it is to work through it with a large dose of positivity over a long period of time and friends who actually care about you. As much as you hate it, talk to them and let the jar empty slowly without making a big mess all over the floor. It's a murder to clean up.

The End

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