each day I'm fighting

This is just a short writing on how I'm feeling journaling

I never imagined myself losing the ability to stand strong against what life throws at me. I've fallen so much that walking upright seems impossible. Chaos has been my entire life and now that I'm battling to change myself, I've noticed it's a constant fight. Between life and trying to figure out who I am now and not letting my past define me it breaks me down. Confusing my heart and my head because both are so screwed up. I tell myself there are others worse off then me so what am I complaining about that life is difficult it's hard period no one has is easy so get over it shut up and deal with it because what you feel has no meaning. Feeling come and go so if I can just let it pass the day will get better yet it never does it continues to turn gray. circumstance and choices bring me down to the point I no longer trust if I'm right causing me to never move staying put because I'm too scared I'll make the wrong move how can someone be happy when the pain drowns there soul smiling each day because her baby boy doesn't deserve to be let down by his broken hurting mother who's trying to change her life.

The End

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