The Name of the River: Brown.

Hess stared contently at the figure above him shouting random remarks at the crowd, who, in turn, grinned delightfully and began yelling random things back. This was the way it always had been for the longest time. He was just a figurehead, staring at the crowd while his so called 'leader' had billions of adoring fans...and haters, but it was all the same anyways. The same smiles and the same exhileration after being finished, like it was all over anyways, until tomorrow.

"God, you'd think these people would get tired of seeing me ALL the fricking time."

"Well, you are quite amazing, my Fuherer."

"Why thank you, Hess. You know, you'd have made a great leader...just born at the wrong time." The awkward silence broke, and they both laughed cheerily.

"What next?" Hess wrung his hands in bored anticipation, glancing at the watch every couple of seconds as the pressure mounted. Damn him. He always thinks he has to make this idiotic silence to get my attention. Always thinks he's better than everyone else. If I wasn't half as crazy, I'd kill him myself. After a couple of moments passed, Hess pretended to look intently at his leader for 'guidance'.

"My good sir. I think we'll get them this time. Honestly, those little rats won't know what's coming for them with this brilliant 'nice' front I've got going on. Even that little rat doesn't know. He thinks we're all crazy, but I can boss him around." Hitler glanced around pompously.

"Yes, mein Furherer." Hess stared forward with a quiet dignity. "All will be dealt with." His eyes were like stones, carefully scanning the horizon.


The children gathered around like a bunch of mixed veggies splattered on a discount cafeteria plate, all rearranged every which way, until the principal came by to straighten them out.

"He's coming!" The children stared at this new, giddy being in front of them. They'd never seen the normally uptight, monotoned crackhead burst into laughter or show any kind of emotion on his wrinkled, saggy face. "Now, children..." He glared back at them, and they returned back to their tight, organized line; he briefly returned to his normal self, and then punched forth as that 5 year old boy again. The children sighed in mock digust.

"Heil!" Hands were thrust forwards, some with compromise. This included the 92 year old mathematics teacher, who had some heavy issues with arthritus; yet he painfully thrust his arm forward as well, and would realize the consequences later.

A meek looking man in a brown suit emerged from the vehicle and stepped up to the platform, smiling slightly. He waited. The quiet buzz became quiet. Someone coughed, and he glared back at them with quiet intensity. Silence. Full silence.

"Now, I want to talk to you about something, my lovelies." He had this sickly sweet expression on his face. Some of the children backed away, for he looked as though he was going to spit at some of the Jewish children in front, but he held back, and they stepped forward warily. " I want to send you on a special top secret mission. Would you do that for me?"

All the eager faces nodded simultaneously. Hess glanced off to the corner to review his notes, repeating the rest of Hitler's speech word for word until finally, Hitler said in a whisper, "See how before all the 'people' got here...." He held up a small drawing of a blue river with happy smiling animals. "And after." He held up another sheet of paper, and this time, it was a murky river with hardly any life. "We must re-create this magnificant river again." All the children clapped after a moment of silence. They realized it was over.

Hess carried his wary leader back into the car, white-faced. His bushy eyebrows sweat under the intense power and significance the presentation had on him, but even he didn't say a word as they returned back to the office.

The End

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