*insert snappy title here*

Phew...tough act to follow; especially since apparently it doesn't matter why I write. I kid; I kid because I love...

Why? Why, why, why, why, why, why?

I think its hard to answer the question of why as much as it is easier to answer when.

When: 1989, my first year of elementary school; and by first year I mean actual first year as I had successfully passed both the JK and SK of the academic worlds. It was not easy though, them were some tough blocks to build.

I digress, it all began with a squiggly line. That's right, or write, I should say; my career, my lifelong passion, my dream of becoming the new york times #1 best seller started with a tiny mishapen line. It wasn't even that great of a squiggle line; I mean it was all over the place and the squiggles weren't even, but still it was a squiggle line.

I had sprung an interest in Bill Pete books and the magical world's they had hidden beneath the covers, with beautiful illustrations to match the artistic portrait painted by the author Mr. Pete himself. (On a side note: If anyone actually remember's Bill Pete and his wackadoodle of crazy animals, my hat off to you).

Of course around the same time we had begun creative writing; the catch was that we were 1st graders and therefore had no idea how to spell anything but enormously hilarious words like poo, poop, pee, fart, and bubble; don't ask, I never did. So to make up for the lack of spelling we were told to put the first letter of the word we didn't really know how to spell and then follow it with a squiggle line. Trying to keep the line the length of how long we would think the word would be.

I really don't think I have to tell anyone here, that my page was in fact covered in squiggle lines. There was not a single word spelt anywhere.

Nonetheless, this sparked my interest and immediately I wrote my first publication of: The Yellow Chick; and oh yes, the cover was actually in the shape of a yellow chick covered in fuzzy yellow felt. That's how I roll.

My interest immediately grew from books about chicks, to books about dinosaurs (I was a huge dinosaur fanatic). Also, I was soon able to evolve from the squiggle lines and begin to spell out words on my own. No longer did I have to resort to poo and pee to get a laugh, I was on my way to bigger and better things. Poo, pee, poop.

My first novel would have been written in my first year of highschool. I was a minor 9'er and I didn't have a lot of friends, you know writer, the loner type. I had so many ideas and creative thoughts but people were too weirded out by them.

I wrote my first book, The Slayer; and yes, it was a major rip off of Buffy the Television series. Sarah Michelle Gellar, if you've been reading my work, please don't sue me!

The problem was that the book was a running work; to put it in easier terms, it never ended. This was not however the neverending story, which in fact DID end, thank you flavoured false advertising. No no, this was the Neverending Sh*ttiest book you've ever read...story. It was full of plot holes, and constant additions of new characters, and blah, blah blah, blah blah!

Bottom line is, it ended up in the drawer of dispair, AKA my desk drawer that was so messy even Satan himself would never look in there, and I moved onto newer works.

I evolved with the work, I grew, I meshed and formed and molded. I had fights with people, and I even tried to make my own movie, which failed for blatant lack of participation by the members of my class.

Finally I went to college, got some fun out of me, made some good friends and that was when I started Trooper. Trooper in my mind will always be my golden child. It may not be the best written book, but it was what started me on the path to ideas that didn't always revolve around ghost, vampires or the supernatural. Trooper made me realize that there is more out there than just copying ideas from things you see on television. Which is when the Door came next, and then other titles, until finally Jillian and I started working on The Dark/The Dawn, which I know will be a huge success.

I owe it all to a few squiggle lines, and a lot of Bill Pete books, I don't think that I'll ever be able to top 'The Yellow Chick', but I'll come pretty close.

So thats how I started, but not WHY I write; I hear the groans alright and I don't appreciate them, the chapter will be over when I damn-well say it is.

Okay so down to the why; it starts with my Mother. She is the one who always taught me that poor grammar is the devil's playground. No I'm joking, but she was hardcore grammar and english as she used to be a teacher herself, and she was damned if she was going to raise two children who couldn't properly announciate and present themselves in a manner suiting of a british woman's children.

We also go raisins as reward and I mean how can you go wrong there?

My mom has always been my inspiration and my how and why; she's always been interested or tried to show interest even when some of my writing was a little too crass for her taste.

Also my dad plays a strong part too. My life has always been full of disappointments to them. I didn't do that well in school, I didn't make it through college, I couldn't keep a lot of jobs. I have trouble with money sometimes.

I just want to do something that will make my dad say,  'James, I'm proud of you son, and I love you', and I just want to see my Mom smile that little smile she gets when I've done something that she never dreamed of me doing.

That's why I write, so that I can prove to my parents that they raised a man, and not just a little boy.

So, that's little ol' me; and I am curious so I just have to ask: why do you write?

The End

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