It goes round and around, never leaving me alone
I can't drink enough to shut it off that way
As he said: 'sometimes we need to park the damn thing.'
If I stop, I know what happens
The sickness, the jealousy.
Constantly watching her with him, even though they're miles away
And probably not together
'GIVE ME A VENT' I scream.
Everyone turns around to look. They understand, but they don't know how to say it.
They know how to stop it, but I'm not interested in that.
I don't want the distraction, the meaningless prose
I don't want a degree in trivialities.
I want to beat it all.
To beat them all.
I want this sickness to transpire
Into a sentence more violent
Than a cold steel bar to the base of the neck.
I want the guilt to evolve
Into a sentence more emotive
Than any tears all of the conformists have ever shed.
I want this lack of faith to breed
Into a sentence
That stops you all,
And in that silence you will realise that moment
It is yours as well,
Because I finally became good enough
To give something back.
Why do i do this?
Because I still don't have the courage
To face what happens