Everything was gone. The spare room... my room, was officially ready for me to move in. I sat on the empty bed and looked around. It was so... odd. Empty. I knew I had to go and fetch my stuff, but I knew that doing that might mean I'd see Sam again. And... well that I just wasn't sure I could cope with.
Liam popped his head round.
"Have you called Sam yet?" I shook my head. "Damn it Cara. You have to."
"I know. I just... I can't stand the thought that she'll want my stuff gone."
"Cara, you broke it off. And if you want to get back with her you have to fight. Maybe suggest starting over, with you living here?"
"I can't Liam. I hurt her too much. I can't do that to her again. She deserves better than that."
"Maybe she doesn't want anyone else."
"Maybe. But she deserves someone else." I sighed and tucked my legs up under my chin. "I should get back to Anna's. Grab my stuff from there."
"Thought that was tomorrow?"
"Call Sam. I'll stay with you if you want."
"No... no that's okay. I'll call her on the way back. Thanks for clearing the room though." I looked round and smiled. "It's nice."
"Yeah it's not bad. My room beats yours though."
"Shut up." I smiled. "You ought to get something on that eye you know."
"Nah. It'll make the chicks dig me." He said in his best Jak voice.
"Idiot." I smiled and got up. We walked downstairs and I grabbed my jacket. "Well, here I go."
"And tomorrow you'll live here. Insane."
"I think it'll be fun."
"Yeah. Jak can look after Ali and I can look after you."
"Who says I need looking after?"
"You just got out of surgery a week ago."
"So there you go. Anyway, go, call Sam and enjoy your last night with Anna. We'll go out tomorrow night to celebrate or something."
"Could we wait till the weekend? I think moving is going to tire me out for the rest of the week."
"Sure. On it. I'll plan. Now bugger off. I want to enjoy my last night of freedom."
"You're hilarious." I replied dryly, and then gave him a hug. "I'll text you, let you know the plans for tomorrow."
"Jak's got the van all cleaned out and ready."
"Great." I tried to smile but the idea of taking everything from the place I'd called home for several months... it didn't fill me with joy.
"You'll be fine Cara. Go." He kissed my head and hurried me out of the door. I took a deep breath and set off down the path. What would I say to Sam? What could I say to not hurt either of us? There was no answer to that. I knew I was severely fucking up. I took another deep breath and decided to just jump in at the deep end. I took the side path I didn't usually take, and dialled Sam's number. It rang and rang...
"S-Sam. It's... it's Cara."
"I have caller id Cara."
"...Is this about your things?"
"Yeah. Yes... I was wondering..."
"...If you could pick them up? Tomorrow?" I frowned.
"Yeah... did someone-"
"I had warning yes."
"Doesn't matter. I'm out of the city right now anyway. You can let yourself in and get your stuff."
"Oh... thanks. Where are you?"
"I'm..." Her voice faltered a little. "It doesn't matter. I have to go. Goodbye Cara." She hung up before I could say anything. Oh god. Oh god... I could feel the wrenching in my chest and my tears beginning to flow. I quickened my pace and realised I was on the highstreet. Pieces was just a little way up, in the opposite direction to Anna's flat. I took a deep breath. She wasn't there. I took a step and then shook my head. I couldn't. Tomorrow would be painful enough. I had to go back to Anna's. Now.
I got back and Anna wasn't there. I guessed she'd gone for a jog or something, so I made myself some tea and sat on the sofa. Tears dripped from my eyes in to the cup as I sat, barely aware of the t.v. which I had switched on. Anna found me like that half an hour later. She sat besides me, pulled me in to a hug, and then made toast for us. I chewed small pieces and told her what had happened. She just listened, didn't say anything until I'd finished.
"It'll be alright Cara. At least now you won't have to see her."
But part of me had wanted to.