I packed the majority of my things but left the clothes in my drawers out so I could wear them as Cara had suggested. I was amazed by the amount of stuff I had, a large amount of it I had acquired whilst I had been at university. I texted Megan to ask how her packing was going and was surprised when she said that she hadn’t started.
“Hey Cara, can you believe that Megan hasn’t started to pack yet, she said she was going to,”
“Well she obviously realised that you still have a month left and there is no point in packing so early,” she replied taking a sip of tea, and a bite of her sandwich. Liam, Cara and I had taken a trip to the sandwich shop down the road after I had packed as much as I could. Liam still insisted that I had packed too much stuff and I would be moaning later on when I needed my hair dryer and straighteners which I had already packed.
“I’ll just let my hair dry naturally,” I had replied,
“Anna, the day that you go out anywhere with your hair anything but dried and straightened hair is the day I stop singing,” Cara cut in with a giggle, “I mean c’mon Anna, I have known you countless years and I have lost count of the number of events that we have been more than fashionably late for because you hair wasn’t perfect,” Cara said grinning for the first time in ages, it seemed that teasing me had cheered her up.
“Well….” I had said unsure, “I’ll borrow Megan’s”
“She’ll never get it back,” Cara had said before having to dodge a poke from me, Liam was doubled over with laughter.
I finished my sandwich and placed the plate onto the table,
“Weren’t hungry then Anna?” Liam noted, he still had half of his sandwich left, my eyes flitted towards Cara who was sitting in the chair opposite, and she hadn’t touched her sandwich but instead was staring at her phone.
“Seriously Cara, you’ll just upset yourself looking at that photo, why don’t you change it?” I suggested gently, I knew that she could react in two ways, either she would change her background on her phone or she would get upset.
She sat in silence for a moment or two before speaking,
“But that is admitting to myself that it is actually over and I don’t think I can face that Anna.”
“You are only going to upset yourself more if you keep it though Cara. Why don’t you change it, you don’t have to delete the picture but don’t have it as your wallpaper so then you don’t have to see it all the time,”
“Anna is right Cara; you won’t be constantly reminded if you change it,”
“But…..” Cara began but then stopped, obviously trying to think of a good enough reason to be able to keep it, “I’ll change it later,” she said finally,
“Cara,” Liam said but before he could talk, she cut across him,
“Liam, I will change it, I promise, just later.”
Liam left not long after as it was getting late and he needed to get back because Amanda wanted to see him, something of which he didn’t seem that excited about. In my eyes, the girl was a nut job and he needed to get out of there.
For some reason a silent hung over both Cara and I that evening, perhaps it was because we both had a lot to think about, what with me going to America, Cara and Sam’s breakup and all the repercussions of that and although we both knew what was happening in the not so distant future, there was still an air of uncertainty.
“Are you okay if I go for a shower, or do you want to?” I asked Cara a while later, she still hadn’t changed the wallpaper on her phone and therefore unsurprisingly was distracted, staring unblinkingly at her phone, so didn’t answer immediately. “Cara?” I said pulling her out of her reverie.
“Sorry what?” she asked,
“I said, are you okay if I go and have a shower now, or do you want one?”
“Anna, you don’t need to ask me to use your own shower, its your house,” Cara murmured,
“Yes I know but still,” I said smiling softly down at Cara, who was curled up in the chair. I patted her shoulder and headed towards the bathroom, locking the door behind me.
I allowed the water to trickle down my body enveloping me like a warm hug; I inhaled the steam and allowed myself to relax slightly. Everything was moving so quickly, in a months time I would be moving across the ocean for a year, away from my friends and family and it was exciting to think about but scary. I had everything organised and yet a felt disorganised.
Maybe this sense of disorganisation was due to everything going on, Cara breaking up with Sam, Ali’s pregnancy, Liam dating such a bitch and to top it off, my mum rejecting me because I was gay. Maybe because my mind was so focussed on all of that, I had lost track of myself. There always seemed to be something going on and I needed to relax.
Everything was sorting itself out and a shower was just what was needed, I let out a sigh of relaxation as I let the water fall.