We bought bread from the shop that Anna worked at and made our way to the water. I felt a little sick, all the sweets and chocolate had obviously had taken effect. We threw bits of bread at the swans and ducks on the water, and watched them flock towards us like some sort of army.
"Stop checking your phone." Anna nudged me as I peeked at it again.
"Sorry." I sighed.
"Why are you so worried? It's two weeks, and she isn't going to go off with anyone."
"I'm not worried. Not really. I just can't believe she's not going to be there when I wake up in the morning."
"Christ Cara, she's not dead. Besides I told you, sleep at mine. Then you won't be on your own."
"It's not the same though." I shrugged sadly. "Ugh. Ok, I'm cheering up. Come on. Let's get on the boat."
We raced to the boat house and rented a small paddle boat to go out on the lake. Anna giggled as we tried to work at the same time, and failed.
"Ok, ok, slow down. We're going to just keep going in circles!" I laughed. Minutes later we got the hang of it, and paddled at the same time across the lake. It was nice, being on the water, under the sun. We stayed out for the full half hour, and then headed in.
"So, want to continue the Harry Potter marathon?" Anna asked as we headed back trhough the park.
"Yeah. But I can't manage any more treats."
"That's ok, more for me." She grinned. I laughed and called her a pig, then we made our way arm in arm to the flat.
"Just going to use your toilet Anna." I called as she grabbed some beers. I went and peered in to the mirror. It no longer looked like I'd been crying, which was an improvement. Thank god. I sat on the toilet and listened to Anna bustling round the kitchen. I was lucky to have such a good friend, despite all that had happened.
Ugh, my period again. It was early.
"Anna, can I use some of your stuff?"
"PMS striking like a bitch."
"Oh, sure." She chuckled.
I sorted myself out and went back in the lounge.
"Thanks. Guess we figured out why I'm overreacting to Sam leaving."
"Yeah it does make you crazy." She chuckled. "Beer?"
"Please." I took one and drank some, then groaned. "Good beer. Anyway. Harry Potter. Number four. Get it going."
"Ok ok!" She laughed and stuck the DVD in. I sat on the sofa and watched as the adverts flew past.
"I was thinking about getting a tattoo... what do you think?"
I frowned. A tattoo? I hadn't really thought Anna was the type.
"A tattoo? What kind?"
"I was thinking butterflies, on my shoulder."
I held back a grimace. I hated when people got butterflies. It was so... tacky.
"Well, they're peaceful, beautiful animals and they are elegant creatures. Plus, you know, they're my favourite animal."
"You don't like it?"
"Well, I'm not really a fan. But it's not up to me, if you want one you should get it! It's all about your decision Anna." I smiled. "I fully support you doing what you want."
"Do you like tattoos?"
"Does it matter?"
"Not to my decision. I just wanted to know."
"I think some are nice. But some can look tacky. It depends on what they are and the meaning behind it I guess."
"And butterflies don't make the cut?"
"Anna does it matter? If you want butterflies go and have them done! I'll even come with you if you'd like."
"And get one yourself?" She grinned.
"Nope." I laughed. "You're on your own for that; I hate needles."
"But if you were going to get one, what would it be?"
I pondered for a moment.
"Three stars, behind my ear like this." I showed her, trailing my finger down.
"Why?" She asked curiously.
"Well, my mum always told me my grandma was looking down from the stars. I'd do it to commemorate her. And also because I want to shine like a star on stage." I laughed.
"Come on, it's starting, let's watch." I smiled, changing the conversation. "Bet Mikey would be jealous if he knew we were watching."
"Your nephew?" She teased.
"Shut up. He's adorable. I'd be happy if he was actually my nephew." I took a swig of beer.
"Maybe you and Sam should have kids."
I almost spat the beer across the living room.
"What?" I asked, staring at her.
"Well, maybe when you two have been together a while, you could have kids."
"I- well... I guess. Maybe." I shrugged, pretending to be unaffected by the suggestion. "I don't know. I wouldn't have kids until I had a job I don't think."
"What and give up being a housewife?" She teased. I pulled a face at her and poked her side.
"Alright miss 'just saying'. Can we watch the film in silence now?"
Anna stuck out her tongue and turned her eyes to the screen.
Me and Sam have kids? I hadn't even thought about it. But now... Sam would be so good with kids. She was good with Mikey. I could imagine little ones running around, her coming in and picking them up, grinning...
"Hey, you realise the film is supposed to keep your mind occupied?" Anna nudged me.
"Your fault, putting ideas in my head." I muttered and focussed on the film again.