As the end of the academic year was fast approaching I was forced to focus on some of the end course assessments which I had been neglecting for weeks. I had been so busy being depressed over getting rejected and loosing Cara that I’d lost sight of why I was really at university. At least to pass the first year at university I only needed to get 40% meaning that I could wing some of the modules. Two months was plenty of time to skim off all my essays and assignments and maybe even get them read over and edited before handing them in.
I had decided on the day that Cara and Sam had packed all of Cara’s things that I could handle life on my own. I didn’t need friends, they just become cause for heartache and that’s something I couldn’t afford to be suffering. Cara and Liam hadn’t bothered to get in contact, they had come and collected their belongings when I was out so that they didn’t have to see me and when they were finished, posted their keys through the letterbox as proof that they weren’t going to come back.
I began to spend vast amounts of time in the library, working late into the night and sometimes having to be prompted that the library would be shutting in half an hour. I was surprised that I wasn’t on a first name basis with the staff. Sometimes I was sure I would catch glimpses of Cara and Sam in the library too, sitting at a table skimming through books but I would position myself out of sight from Cara and continue to work without showing any signs of having seen her or Sam.
Loneliness was however taking its toll however, there was only so many times I could rattle around a flat and be content just watching the TV. Having no-one began to hurt, became an ache which I couldn’t seem to get rid of. I lost all motivation for everything; I lost my appetite and even contemplated ringing Cara up and begging her to come back. I didn’t. Instead I turned all this pain and hurt into motivation into getting thinner, I had being comfort eating and I felt as though it had distorted my figure and felt fat so I started going to the gym very regularly.
Sweat was beading off my face as I ran as fast as I could on the treadmill which was on a ridiculously high setting with a gradient set. I had my ipod plugged in and had my earphones blasting out songs, blocking out the noises of the other machines. I had been running for about half an hour and was getting pretty tired but was pushing though the tiredness, knowing that if I kept on going it would hopefully pass. I pressed the “cool down” setting and the treadmill began to slow down to a much steadier pace, allowing me to catch my breath slightly. I pulled the chord attached to me and the treadmill stopped entirely. I suddenly felt lightheaded. Sitting myself down on the treadmill I took some steadying breaths then stood up. As I scanned to room I saw Cara and Sam enter, both wearing matching jogging bottoms and a black strappy top, Cara’s emphasised her breasts and her beautiful figure.
Feeling relatively okay now I headed towards the bikes which were in the corner and out of Cara’s line of vision for she had just gotten onto the rowing machines however Sam had just hopped onto the treadmill I had just left. To avoid being seen by either of them I decided to leave the gym and come back again later on for another work out session. It wasn’t however until I had left that I realised that I had left my ipod in the treadmill pocket.