This was such bullshit. Every day the same old crap within these damn puke coloured corridors. The only thing I had to look forward to was the taste of smoke in my mouth and the feeling of heroine coursing through my veins. Life was bullshit, and we all had our ways of dealing with it. I had chosen this path, this was my road. Happiness is a delusion, hope is deception.
It's almost pitiful how some god forsaken insects cling onto the threads of impossibility, till it's ripped from their grasp along with beating heart from its frail and bony fortress. I was once one of those godforsaken idiots, till the truth was painfully stabbed into my guts, and sliced through my flesh. It hurt then, and it still hurts now.
There are only moments when the pain numbs out, only small, fragile seconds, when the world seems like a dreamland, a fairy tale waiting to slowly unfolded, and once that time was up, you just wanted to go right back there. Sorry, scrap that, I wanted to go back there, to that place where the world seemed...nonexistent.
I wanted to smack that grin off his face. Four year flunky, and an A-Class drug dealer of our school; Craig Roberts. He knew it; he knew I'd be back. Everyone eventually came back. Once you've taken a whiff of that poison, you get this horrible ache for the entire experience. It's simply human nature.
"I knew you'd be back, bro." That damn smile widened. I could tell from his expression and the vacant look in his eyes, that he himself had just taken something strong. I didn't want to have to come back. I never wanted to, but to be honest, I didn't think I had a choice.
He passed me a syringe, neatly packed up in a plastic wrapping. "Guaranteed safety." His breath smelt like piss. I gulped. What was I doing? The cigs were fine, but this? Was it ok; was it really the road I wanted to walk down on?
"Yes. It is. You have no choice."The voice rang in my head, again and again, reminding me of the pain, of the black hole gnawing at my stomach.
The transaction was made quickly and silently. I turned to walk away "You could stay here, and I could show you how." He whispered in my ear. I already knew how. I'd known for some time. "I’ll give you just the right amount, and make it feel really good.” I hesitated. “It won't hurt. Promise." He continued to mutter in my ear. Ya, he was the kind of person my ma used to tell me to stay away from. Too bad she's not here anymore. I wouldn’t be here if she was. Ya, I needed this. I wouldn’t last a full day without it.
"Show me." I managed to choke out. He began with his nonsensical smirking. His eyes began to glow with a strange unearthly flash.
"I have a feeling you’re going to be a regular."He mused as he unwrapped the packets carefully. “What the hell am I doing?” I asked myself, even though I knew very well what I was doing. I was going past the point of no return.
I felt the needle pierce through my veins, a moment of slight discomfort, of slight pain, and then....... oh God.