Xian- Morning BluesMature

Getting up in the morning was so damn painful. The drums of a hangover beat on the sides of my scull like a war drum. It was like my brain was at war with me, rebelling against the mind altering crap I'd dug in myself last night. Well, too bad for it.

As I slithered out of bed, I took a sideward glance at Ayasa's empty bed. A guy now sat where she had slept, so peacefully in her little sweet dream world.

"I tried to wake you as late as possible. You sleep like the dead." He explained, as he got off the edge and left for breakfast. Speaking of which....where had he gone last night? Well, why the hell should I care?

I skipped breakfast, moving on straight to the bus. "This days going to be shit." I thought, my mind travelling to the drugs. I had none left. I had to get more soon. At least we'd found a dealer. It's almost funny how easy he was to spot.

I sat near Ayasa. She was the only thing good thing about this trip. If that girl's sweet and bitter smile and painfully beautiful eyes weren’t here, Id have done myself in for good, a very long time ago. She was the slither of grey in utter blackness.

As I sat, smiling at her, she jumped to her feet. She looked like a frightened kitten. "Is something wrong?" I asked her. She looked so scared, those beautiful eyes so dead.

"Nothing." She smiled. It was so fake I could have gagged. "I need to ...sit somewhere else...sorry." I just watched her as her as she sat next to that Chloe woman. If my stomach was full of shit, I might have vomited on myself. But I couldn't. I wanted to call out to her. But my voice had disappeared. My throat felt like sand paper.  

To make matters worse, my real roommate came around, casually swung his bag on the seat next to me and sat there, giving out a heaving sigh of relief. If looks could kill, I would have killed him, cremated him, and scattered his ashes by now.

"You mind?" He asked sarcastically sensing my hostility.

"No." I replied. "This is just fucked up." I muttered to myself. I dug my finger nails into my arm, hard enough just to break the skin, pulled down, tearing a small hole in my arm. I never wanted to let go, ever.


The End

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